THAI ELEPHANT CAN’T BELIEVE HE GETS TO MEET ANOTHER BASIC BITCH
Nothing could have prepared Boba the elephant for whom he would meet this afternoon, when a troupe of college students on summer break came bobbing along the muddy path to the sanctuary on a journey to find themselves.
But when Sarah Duffy walked up to him in that special, mesmerized manner of thousands of identical women before her, he felt something he hadn’t felt since exactly 4 seconds ago, when her friend Stacey did precisely the same thing.
Elephants like Boba represent the rare few who have protection from hunters, poachers, and environmental threats, just like Sarah represents the rare woman who likes pumpkin spice in the fall, cute boots for rainy days, and tattoos that say “passion” in another language.
Boba’s encounter with Sarah reached a peak when she leaned onto his trunk and looked up at him in a moment of unquantifiable value and 137 likes on Instagram.
