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You Can Forget Your Exes, but There’s No Need to Forgive Them
Forgiveness can become toxic quickly.
In a world where forgiveness is often heralded as the ultimate act of emotional maturity, it’s no surprise that many of us feel the weight of this expectation. I beg to differ. While society loves to preach the virtues of forgiveness, there are limits to this expectation.
Forgiveness is great, but not at any cost.
We’re bombarded with messages from all directions — movies, books, self-help gurus — all echoing the same sentiment: forgive, and you will find peace. It’s a comforting narrative that promises a neat resolution to our deepest hurts. But what happens when forgiveness feels like a chain rather than a key to freedom?
The dangers of forced forgiveness.
Forgiveness is ingrained in our culture, often framed as a moral obligation. From childhood, we’re taught that holding a grudge is unhealthy, that anger poisons the soul, and that to be “the bigger person” means to forgive those who’ve wronged us. For a long time, every time someone said that they were sorry, I just accepted their apology. Also, I didn’t feel like the apology was sincere or that it made a difference. Honestly, I just wanted the tension to stop. The easiest way to do that is to accept…
