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How Sports Coaches Taught Me I Deserve Abuse
Abuse of Horse and Rider is still the Social Norm in Most Stables
My trainer said, “It’s all your fault.”
So did the next one. And the one after that. And the one after that.
Eventually, I started to believe. How could I not?
They were the experts. The professionals. The ones whose job it was to tell me what I was doing wrong, so that I could fix it. The ones who knew what they were doing. They were the adults, and I was just a child, trying to learn to ride. I was just a child. I was just a child. I was just. A child.
1.
The first time it happened, I was on an Appaloosa gelding named Cochise. When it was time to trot, I squeezed with my legs. He did not move. The trainer said, “kick.” I kicked. He turned around and tried to bite me.
Now, there are a lot of reasons why a horse might not want to move forward. Maybe he is wearing a saddle that fits badly. Maybe his belly hurts and he is trying to communicate that he is in pain: horses have notoriously sensitive stomachs, and very little alternative ways to…