I Wasn’t Supposed to Make it Past 25
Jokes on You, I’m Still Alive
“We never had nothin’ handed,
Took nothin’ for granted”
— Kanye West ‘04
Where were you when College Dropout was released? I was at 6217 s. Calumet Apt. 904. A public housing unit, or what is often referred to as the Projects in Chicago, IL. That was the first place where I heard Kanye West’s hit record “We Don’t Care”. I was 8 years old at that time. Now, 17 years later I reflect and recite lyrics that accurately depict my life and the experiences that I’ve had in my community. Half shocked that I actually made it to the age of 25 and half heartbroken because I know so many others that did not, I write this with the goal of drawing attention towards the cycles of poverty in the city of Chicago.
“But as a shorty I looked up to the dope man,
Only Adult Man I knew that wasn’t broke man”
Chicago is notorious for being a gangster city. Al Capone set the tone on how to be an American gangster and a businessman during the era of Prohibition (1920–1933). According to several sources, he had a net worth of $100 million at the height of his power, which calculates to about $1.5 billion today. Coincidentally, many African Americans were traveling from the rural South to cities like Chicago as part of The Great Migration (1916–1970). The Great Migration is significant because that moment in history outlines the beginning of enhanced structural racism in Chicago (and other cities), which systematically kept Black people away from fair and equal opportunities.
Segregation, job disparities, and racial profiling were being established in the City of Chicago just as the Black people who moved there were attempting to establish themselves. It is no wonder that Chicago has ended up in the state that it is in now. When resources are cut short, many turned to a life of crime with the honest attention of changing their economic background to help their family.
As early as the age of two, I had been exposed to this history by the people in the community. The biggest lesson that I learned from interacting with them was that a life of crime will lead me to one of two places: dead or in jail.
I was able to graduate from Morehouse College, I was able to form my own life goals, I was able to live because all the gangsters told me to go to school.
If it had not been for them, and the tutelage of my father, I would have met a similar end as many others have in the city of Chicago.
“You know the kids goin’ act a fool,
When you stop the programs for after school”
Chicago is notorious for being a talented city. From Michelle Obama to Chief Keef, the city of Chicago has always had pioneers in various industries that inspire and mold cultures around the world! But, why do they shut our schools down? In 2013, former Mayor Rahm Emmanuel closed 50 schools in Chicago under the guise that it would improve student learning by providing better opportunities for success. In 2018, the University of Chicago released a study detailing how ineffective and harmful the plan turned out to be. In 2019, Sarah Kahp reported on NPR WBEZ Chicago that 45% of Black males ages 20–24 in Chicago were out of work and out of school.
These statistics show a record link between education and violence as it was reported in 2019 that the city was 50 times over the national rate of adolescents (15–19) being killed by gun violence. Some have even called this issue a public health crisis.
I call it a national emergency.
“Look what was handed us, Fathers abandoned us”
I was not supposed to make it past 25 because I grew up in the inner-city of Chicago. The same place where the nation abandoned us. Seriously, there’s something about growing up in poverty or more specifically, under the subjugation to redlining and systemic racism that makes you feel as though you should not exist in this world. I wish this shit was a joke; but, the reality is that Black Chicagoans have a lower life expectancy than white counterparts. Even now, Black residents die at nearly six times the rate of white residents from the Coronavirus.
My birthday was on February 9th of this year. I secretly have a hard time celebrating my birthday in a traditional sense (party, dinner, fun) for two reasons:
1. I have memories of my father taking me out that won’t happen again.
2. In 2013, I attended my dear childhood friend’s funeral on my birthday and couldn’t even get in because her death was so publicized.
Still, every year I make it a goal to be even better than I was the last year. If you are reading this and you are from Chicago, I wish the same for you. I wish it for everyone but you especially! You are meant to be here on this earth at this time. The more you believe in yourself, despite everything that your environment may tell you, the further you will go.
I know sometimes it feels like no one in this world understands us…
“But we don't care what people say!”
