Ways That You Might Be Victim Blaming Without Even Knowing
How We Can Stop Victim Blaming in Every-Day Life
TW: Rape and Sexual Assault
A girl arrives at a party, dressed in her best clothes, excited to have fun with her friends. She moves from room to room in the frat house, drinking, and dancing, talking to everyone she knows. The guy that has been talking to her notices when she becomes too incapacitated and leads her up to her room. At this point, she is too intoxicated to consent to any sexual activities, but he engages anyways.
This scenario occurs many times, and I have heard many excuses from men, as well as blaming the survivors, as to why this situation occurred. Comments such as “Why didn’t you scream?”, “You were asking for it with that outfit”, “You were drunk”, and “What did you expect going to a party” pepper the conversation. This discourse shames the people who were sexually assaulted, instead of the assailant. No one “deserves” to be assaulted, based on any circumstances, male or female.
The action that is taken to avoid rape is aimed at girls to behave better, or stay safer, to constantly look after each other, to carry pepper spray on key chains, to not walk alone at night. As well as advising women to carry keys in their hand as a weapon, looking underneath their car…
