A Mothers Hug
The need for a mother’s tender touch
Today, I listened to something that had me extra emotional. Something I spoke to someone in confidence about went and “showed concern.” It’s in quotation marks because it’s not a genuine concern. I have a wound that’s so deep that sometimes I feel it’s impossible to close. I think I understand why showing real love for people is so difficult. I believe this is because of the lack of love that parents show.
Some mothers have a way of projecting things onto their children. I can attest to this because I’ve done it. I want to use an older woman as an example. Some of them are stuck in a time zone. Some think they are still a teenager while in their sixties and seventies. I sometimes wonder if they had the same pressures of being a mom, which is why many have withheld their love from their children. They weren’t told to do better or to learn and put in effort. I think they just went with it. However, just going with the flow could be detrimental.
The importance of a mother hugging her children may influence someone’s life, whether male or female. When a mother withholds that particular moment, in an instant, it can create insecurity and rejection. If you are being rejected by the one who gave birth to you, then that will cause some issues in your life. When a daughter cries into her mother’s arms, she feels safe and comfortable. She knows she has a support system that will help her during those hard times. She feels love and acceptance. When a son cries to his mother, it's a special bond that is being created. The son feels vulnerable and safe as well. He won’t grow up being distant from his mother.
I have major trust issues regarding some of the “elders” I know (just because someone is older doesn’t make them an elder in the mind), but I digress. I want my children to know they can come to me. I want them to be able to cry into my arms if they ever need to and not feel ashamed for doing so. That’s something I know I lack in my life because I see it in my dreams. I dream of hugging someone and just weeping tears into their shoulder. I wake up crying often. It’s strange how that happens still. I have a deep, gut-wrenching cry that needs to be let out, but I stifle it because my tears are not to be taken advantage of as many have done. My tears will not be brought up in your conversation so that you can gossip about it. That annoys me.
My path will be a beautiful experience because I am learning to be present. I enjoy hugging my children more. I enjoy showing that I am here now. So, daily, I make myself new and show them that love doesn’t have to be an illusion. It can be felt when we allow it, too. For those who refuse to love, I think that’s something that needs to be uplifted off of them. Sadly, I can’t do it. I could only offer suggestions and leave it be. Maybe if we cry out a little more, things can change slightly. I know that the generational curse stops with me, and my children will be better adults because of it. 💕💐
