Beautiful, just, I’m deathly afraid

Ian Guerin
Sep 22, 2018 · 3 min read

Mohamad —

My brother from 317.

It’s been a minute, so I’ll catch you up.

I live in a van. I have been living in a van for 100 days now. As of today. Of course. Right now I’m in Maine. Hiking every inch of trail that lay before me. I’ve seen 48 of the 50 states over the last 100 days. I intend to see the final two this upcoming week. But not before writing to you.

To me, you. You’ve always studied what peaked your interest. You get excited about the details of things. My freshman year I ran through scheme after scheme with you. You were addicted to becoming the next Mark Z. Did you? Perhaps not. But that guy is a dick. Probably.

Long hikes let my mind wander. And today, I hiked a lot. I hiked the Beech Cliff Ladder Trail, and the Cadillac Mountain West Face Trail, the Cadillac Mountain North Face Trail, the Kebo Brook Trail, and the Beehive Loop for a total of about 12 miles of hiking. The Beehive was the funnest one, that had some difficult scrambling. I’m supposed to spend all day tomorrow in Bar Harbor, but someone told me the Precipice trail is like Beehive but a little longer, so I’ll just have to amend my schedule!

Wander as I may, I was thinking about the last time we had a meal together. At 99 miles to Philly in the East Village of Manhattan. That was right around the summer of 2016, and it has surely been to long. I’m moving to Seattle in a month, so it’s set to be even longer until our paths cross. And I sure hate the way that sounds.

Bates Cairns which I’m led to believe are unique to Acadia as trail markers

You’ve always been an interesting perspective in my interaction with the world. I never approach a business idea without thinking for a moment how you might bring a tsunami of energy to it. I don’t think about worldly matters without wondering what your learned perspective might be. Especially, you being an ivy boy and all.

Beehive Trail pictures
Thunder Hole and a majestic bird

As our paths first crossed by mere coincidence, I am certain that they are destined to route across each other again. I look forward to that. In the meantime, I have this great idea for a home-rolled cigarette company… You in?

Yours —



  • It’s getting cold
  • Maine might be my favorite east coast state, aside from the empire state of mind
  • I’ve been on the road for 100 days (my original estimate for the entirety of the trip)
  • I drove 61 miles today

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