Understanding the Patrons/ Prisoners of Pride: Have we Decriminalized our Minds yet?
- Kashish Dua and Himani Singh
On September 6, 2018 when the Supreme Court of India decriminalized homosexuality, both mainstream and social media were taken over by rainbows and pictures of happy faces of queer people. This wave of joy that was important to mark the celebration of this long-due landmark judgement unfortunately became a way of overlooking the harsh realities that lie beyond the legal changes.
Two years since, it is critical to ask how many people in India actually understand the everyday issues faced by queer people? Let alone the issues, many of us still struggle to answer simple questions about the meaning of the often used LGBTQIA+ acronym.
Very few of us can claim that our knowledge of queer people goes beyond that of having watched a couple of films or shows that have gay characters. While some of us might be outrightly against queerness, some of us might show a little tolerance by stating that we are okay as long as it is not happening within our homes or to our children. But is this tolerance enough? Can we really call ourselves “progressive” if we cannot be true allies of the LGBTQIA+ community?
LGBTQIA+: What’s in a Name?
Lesbian: Women who are romantically and sexually attracted to other women.
Gay: Men who are romantically and sexually attracted to other men.
Bisexual: Men or women who are romantically and sexually attracted to both people of the same and the opposite sex.
Transgender: People who do not identify with the sex assigned to them at birth based on their reproductive organs.
Queer: People who do not identify as heterosexual or even with the common labels represented by LGBTIA+. It is also used as an umbrella term to generally refer to the entire community of people who don’t identify as heterosexual.
Intersex: People whose sexual anatomy does not conform to the conventional male-female anatomy.
Asexual: People who do not feel sexual attraction for people of any gender and sex but might or might not feel romantic attraction towards people of their preferred gender and sex.
Plus (+): Sexuality and gender are extremely personal and subjective experiences. We use identity labels for our own convenience and for legal purposes like demands for rights. Based on the number of people and their varied subjectivities we cannot put a limit to sexual and gender identities. The plus sign in the acronym stands for all those lesser used or undefined identities that people might ascribe to. It often includes people who identify as aromantic, non-binary, and polyamorous amongst others.
Fact or Fiction?
Queerness is unnatural, a hormonal disease or a mental disorder that needs treatment. There has to be a biological dysfunction that makes people queer.
No, in 1975, the American Psychological Association had declared that queerness is not a disease or a disorder. Reports submitted by scientists also state that there are no specific biological reasons for different sexual orientations. It is completely natural so there is no reason why a discussion about treatment or cure should arise. Did you know that in 2018 the Indian Psychiatric Society stated that homosexuality is not a disease?
India does not have queer people. They are either just characters in films and shows or people who want to imitate the practices of the West. Queerness is nothing but a Western trend.
Queerness in India is as old as this place and its culture. We just need to flip through the pages of ancient Indian books including mythologies to notice queer characters that have been kept away from our eyes by orthodox mediators who have always presented to us a history and literature that was predominantly heterosexual. From Shikhandi representing transgenderism in Mahabharata, Ardhanarishvara signifying androgyny as a composite form of Shiva and Parvati in Puranas, Bhaghiratha in Ramayana who was born through the communion of two women, to rekhti poetry in Urdu that talks of same-sex love, the examples of queerness in mythology and literature are just waiting to be noticed.
We cannot forget that to identify as queer means to make yourself vulnerable to violence and discrimination practiced by a society that is largely dominated by people who are heterosexual. Did you know the government of India submitted a report to the Supreme Court in 2012 estimating the presence of 2.5 million gay people in India?
Queerness is a phase born out of hormonal rush that makes young people experiment. It only lasts during the time spent in all-girls or all-boys hostels when access to people of opposite sex is difficult.
It might be true for some people that their same-sex sexual experiences were only be a one-time thing. But the example of a few people cannot erase the experiences of a larger population for whom romantic and/or sexual attraction to people of same sex is an integral part of who they are. Did you know there are several Indians in same-sex relationships who are married to each other?
Queer relationships are just about having sex.
Queer people are not any different from heterosexuals. Their relationships are equally about love and companionship as they are about pleasure. Did you know this idea of always thinking of queer people as sex maniacs is a practice that began with Victorian morality that came with the British colonizers? As per the Puritanical belief sexual intercourse should only be carried out to reproduce and any sexual activity including homosexuality that did not result in reproduction was considered a sin.
Repeal of section 377 of IPC has solved all the problems for queer people. What more do they want?
The repeal of section 377 has only decriminalized homosexuality which means this judgement has merely stated that queer people who have consensual sex in their private space will not be considered criminals. This basic right to love and partner with a person of one’s choice that was never even a concern for heterosexual people was given to the LGBTQIA+ community after 17 years of legal battle. This judgement does not have special provisions to protect LGBTQIA+ people from violence and discrimination. It does not even allow legal recognition of marriage of same-sex couples or other civil rights that come with a legally sanctioned marital partnership like adoption rights, right to inherit property of one’s partner, right to jointly own property or take loans, etc.
Did you know in the two years since the decriminalization, Indian newspapers have reported more than six cases of queer people who died of suicide because they faced harassment for their sexual orientation? There are several deaths that have gone unreported.
Portrayal of LGBTQIA+ in Hindi Cinema and Why it’s Problematic
It is not an unknown fact that mainstream Hindi cinema has been a huge propagator of the myths and biases surrounding LGBTQIA+ community, consciously or subconsciously. Queer characters have often been used to add an element of comedy, such as in Kal Ho Na ho (2003) and Dostana (2008); and even portrayed as home breakers or psychopathic killers, as in Girlfriend (2004).
In the last decade however, the cinema has become more sensitive to the issue and brought forth the struggles of LGBTQIA+ couples in some form or the other. The 2014 black comedy Dedh Ishqiya showcases a lesbian relationship as a back story, while Kapoor & Sons (2016) goes on to show how the elder son of the family is an accomplished writer, and a perfect son in every sense except for his sexual orientation.
The decade also saw several other path breaking movies aligned with the subject which were critically acclaimed but failed to garner much attention of the audience or be as celebrated on the box office as other high profile Bollywood dramas. Stories like Memories in March (2010), Bombay Talkies (2013), Margarita with a Straw (2014) and Purple Skies (2014) are often the most suggested LGBTQIA+ movies from India. Yet these stories luck out when it comes to the grandeur attached to Bollywood; their release on big screen is often short lived and they survive only in small circles of intellectuals.
This lack of attention is not just by the ‘Movie mafia’ as we call them today. A lot of what becomes popular and what gets lost in the shadows is also related to what the audiences want to watch. The cinema feeds us stories, lifestyles, and popular culture. We imbibe and ask for more and add on some elements of what we want to watch in the theatre. It has now become a vicious cycle of demand and supply of superficial realities. While it is glamorous and pleasant to eyes, some essential issues that desperately require a thoughtful exploration through this platform lag behind.
Ek Ladki ko Dekha toh Aesa Laga (2019) and Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhaan (2020) are the two latest Bollywood stories which widened their horizon and included gay/lesbian love stories within the ambit of ‘Rom-Coms’. We must applaud the movie makers for their work. These films demonstrated that it is possible for families to accept their homosexual son and daughter and their partner. It explains to parents that queerness is just a part of their child and the love and relationship shared by the parents and their child remains unaffected.
But there is something more we need to see than just the acceptance of a son/ daughter by a father/ mother who loves their LGBTQIA+ child dearly. We need to see a love story. We need to see how a girl and a girl can fall in love, what is it that makes a guy attracted to a guy. We need to see the equation between an LGBTQIA+ couple on screen, to be able to accept it like we accept the love between a man and a woman. We need to see the chemistry and compatibility, the friendship, and fights, the good, bad, and ugly. We need to see everything, we need to see a relationship!
377 indeed decriminalized gay sex; but love is more than that, isn’t it? How will the decriminalization of our minds happen, if we do not accept the love between two people, no matter who.
To a pleasant surprise, the web series business has done a better job in showcasing the love between gay/ lesbian couples. The Other Love Story (2016) tells the story of two young girls who fall hopelessly in love with each other and just act on it without thinking much about it. Isn’t that what most of us do, or have done at some point in our life, when we are in love? Four More Shots Please (2019) also incorporates a lesbian love story as part of its main plot and shows the two women in love who flirt, pull each other’s bra straps, tease and laugh, fight and make-up, rub their noses and curl up in warm hugs.
The gay/ lesbian love stories and scenes that make our cheeks warm and heart full of joy is what we need to see in mainstream cinema as well. It’s time we see some variety in love, as it exists in the real world!
But more than anything, we need to see real life LGBTQIA+ actors, writers, directors, and producers on screen as well as behind the screen. The actors who appeared as gay/ lesbian/ transgender characters have done a phenomenal job accepting the roles and playing them on screen. But, when a Sonam Kapoor or a Fawad Khan or an Ayushmaan Khurana or Akshay Kumar play gay/ lesbian/ transgender characters, it becomes more about the actors and less about their characters. Even in older days, when Ashutosh Rana (in Sangharsh, 1998) and Paresh Rawal (in Tamannah, 1999) played their respective roles of transgender people, they received accolades from all corners for their performance, but the story of the characters got lost somewhere in the buzz.
We don’t want to watch the LGBTQIA+ stories for the buzz and peculiarity alone. We want to watch because we want to understand them better.
The mainstream film industry must take cues from alternate films and web series which show sensitive engagement and put in a lot of research. The American counterparts — Paris is Burning (1990), Transparent (2014), Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019) etc., are indicators that hiring queer people as contributors to the film can help otherwise rich and popular production houses to create cinema by and for queer people and allies. If the Hindi cinema is genuinely interested in exhibiting the characters associated with LGBTQIA+ community, the community must be a given a chance to do so by themselves. It’s time that the ‘reel world of Bollywood’ becomes inclusive and provides opportunities to queer people to flaunt their colors of pride that they possess.
Yance Ford exclaimed in the Netflix documentary Disclosure: “We cannot be a better society until we see that better society.” Without the better part of the society on screen, how will we see that better society?
The Story of a Joke: A Litmus test for the Millennials
In one of the early episodes of Louis CK, Rick Crom, a gay comedian explains to his poker buddies what it really means to be called a ‘Faggot’. He talks about how the word literally meant, ‘a bundle of sticks used for kindling in a fire’.
The literal meaning does not make instant sense until Rick elaborates that back in the middle ages homosexuals were burnt like witches were burnt in a fire. Except not quite like the witches, because the witches were burnt on a stake. Homosexuals on the other hand, were considered too low and disgusting to be honored with a stake even. So, they were just thrown in the fire — along with other kindling — the other faggots.
Rick also talks about how every gay man in America had heard the term shot at them while being beaten up, quite likely more than once. So, when somebody calls them a ‘faggot’, it brought back all the trauma from the past.
While the show has been criticized severely for unwelcome comedy, this particular episode makes one wonder if a ‘joke’ can really ever be ‘just a joke’. The derogatory terms used for LGBTQIA+ people in India have a lot of variety coupled with distinct connotations. These terms are also used as an insult to heterosexuals. ‘Chakka’ and ‘meetha’ for instance — is used for someone who isn’t masculine enough.
We often disregard these smaller instances, calling it either a ‘joke’ or using the age-old excuse that ‘we didn’t mean it’ or ‘it was meant in a different context’. But each time we do, we fail to recognize that these smaller instances are a tiny aspect of a bigger set of problems.
These ‘jokes’ are reflective of our overall mindset. We may not mean it when we say it, but the fact that a joke based solely on somebody’s sexuality exists, still remains. The joke finds a safe harbor in mainstream cinema we watch, the blog posts we read, the roasting videos we enjoy, the friendly banter we engage in over a drink. It has become part and parcel of our everyday language and dialect. It has been normalized to an extent that we don’t see anything wrong with it.
We don’t automatically become anti-LGBTQIA+ when we engage in this regressive comedy. A person may be a full supporter of LGBTQIA+ rights and may even have queer friends and family, and yet crack these jokes ‘in a different context’. It is understandable. It is a form of casual homophobia we have developed, who knows for how long that has been ingrained in us. So, our behavior is indeed understandable. But is it really right?
When you are faced with a situation, the first thought that comes to your mind is how you have been conditioned to think. But the second thought that comes to your mind, that is what defines who you really are and who you want to be.
If we fail to even transition from the first thought (“It’s just a joke”) to the second thought (“Is it just a joke though?”), then who are we? If we fail to even accept the underlying problem with our deeply homophobic mindset, then are we any better than the active propagators of homophobia?
The joke sustains and thrives on our inability to acknowledge that something, somewhere went wrong. Each time we disregard these instances and refute the opportunity to introspect and improve, we fail a community of people who are fighting for a sense of dignity every day. But even worse, we fail ourselves by losing a chance to define ourselves and become something more than what the society has made us. Why hold ourselves back from evolving into better human beings?
