Making the Most of Furlough Days
How One Fed Maintains Balance During a Government Shutdown
“How are you doing?”
“I’m great — how about you?”
“I’m fine — I was just wondering how you’re doing with the furlough and all?”
“Oh, it’s not really been that much of a problem for me. Today’s the first day since it started that I’m really off, although I had to do a few things from home this morning. I had to go in to the office every day last week (from Wednesday on), and on Monday (New Year’s Eve), so this is my first actual day being off. Keeping busy was good, I didn’t have time to think about it all. Friday got a bit rough, since I only worked for a couple hours, then found myself with time on my hands I didn’t know what to do with.”
My friend knew I’d had some anxiety coming into the furlough that I’d get all messed up, emotionally, like I did the last furlough, in 2013. That time, I’d just had this unspecified rage, and a very unsettled feeling, that grew each day of the furlough until my wife suggested I go volunteer at a food shelter. That had helped a lot, but I was a real emotional wreck until they finally settled the budget and called us back to work. Sustained anger and I do not get on very well. That one had lasted 16 days. We’re in Day 12 of this one. I’m choosing a different tact, this time.
I had felt that same unspecified rage, and general unsettled feeling, when this one began. This time, I had meetings to go to, where I talked about it, which helped a lot. I’m in recovery, clean and sober close to 39 continuous years, but I hadn’t been connected to any 12 Step fellowship for many years.
I found a home in AA three years ago, and go to meetings regularly, now. The rage quickly dissipated over that first weekend, then Christmas Eve and Christmas Day came and I didn’t even think about it all, just enjoyed the family time and had a nice Christmas, with family and friends.
On Wednesday, the day after Christmas, when I went in to perform my orderly shutdown, I learned that I would need to work for at least the next few days. While I am technically “non-excepted”, I was temporarily excepted to get things ready for an upcoming “excepted” training.
A part of me was disappointed — I had actually gotten to where I was looking forward to the unplanned time off. Of course, it helps that I’m in a position where a missed paycheck or two won’t be the end of the world. I know that many affected people, both government employees and contractors, are not in that same boat, and I do feel bad for them. But I, personally, will be fine, financially, for awhile.
Today, I finally got my day off. I still got up early, went to a 7:00 meeting, then came home and took care of a few things that needed tending to, work-related, then read a bit, soaked in the jacuzzi out back, wrote and posted a piece for The Story Hall, then my friend texted, followed by a phone call — “what are you up to?”
I thought he’d be working today, since his agency has a budget (DOD), but he said, “I took a day off — to catch up with you.” I knew that wasn’t the only reason, but that it was one of them. He’s a good and true friend, who really cares about me. I value our friendship. I had sponsored him through the 12 Steps shortly after my return to the rooms three years ago, and have had the supreme privilege of watching him grow in his sobriety. In the meantime, a great friendship has sprung up between us.
We went to a noon meeting out this way, one I hadn’t made in over a year, since I’m usually working downtown when the government is funded. I suggested it, since he still needed to find someone to lead on the 5th step at a meeting he’s chairing tomorrow night, and the noon meeting usually has a lot of people with solid sobriety and step experience, so lots of choices for leads. He did find a lead there, the same guy I was thinking he should ask. It’s freaky when that happens, a roomful of 50–60 people, and we both landed on the same guy for his 5th step lead.
It turned out to be an outstanding meeting. One guy that we’ve gotten to know really well was celebrating his one year of sobriety. Another guy celebrated his 23rd anniversary. Another good friend brought his step-nephew, who we’d heard a lot about a few months ago, as he was instrumental in getting his nephew into a rehab out in West Virginia. The nephew was now out of rehab, and just moved in with his uncle, our friend.
We all went out to lunch after the meeting. The nephew picked up a 30-day chip in the meeting. I could see why his uncle thought so highly of him — he’s a really good kid, who’s had a heck of a struggle with serious addiction, but clearly seems to have found something that is changing his whole life. It’s so energizing when a newcomer has that something going on, like this kid does. We had a lively, engaging discussion over lunch, sharing experience, strength and hope as we ate and talked.
My friend and I wound up chatting for a long time in the parking lot, just catching up. It’s been a long time since I had a friend who I’ve gotten this close with. He looks up to me, but I feel like I get even more out of this friendship than he does. It works that way in the program. They say you have to give it away in order to keep it — but you get so much more back when you do give it away. More than just keeping it, you get to grow with it. You have to keep on growing, or you grow stagnant, which is a bad place to find yourself in.
A little later, I took a five mile hike through the woods and around the north side of town, mostly through a few parks on the edge of the woods, with my friend Wally. It had been quite awhile since I’d had a “walk-with-Wally”, an activity that never fails to be entertaining, and is good for my health.
We talked about everything under the sun, but mostly about his dog, Camsley, who came along for the walk. Camsely’s a big, beautiful black lab, just seven months but already long and lanky, and always ready to run and play.
After a trip to the bank and the post office, I picked up some wings for dinner, and spent a nice evening at home with my wife. It was such a full, fine furlough day, I had to wonder how I ever find the time to actually work, when I’m not furloughed. I’ll just consider it practice for retirement. I might still be six years away from that status, but it’s never too early to start practicing, right?
For a brief moment there, I thought something might happen today to get us back to work by tomorrow or Friday. Then, I heard that the president is standing behind his wall and predicting “a very long shutdown”. It looks like my initial prediction of January 10th is a real possibility — maybe even beyond that.
I better get some rest — tomorrow is likely to be another busy furloughed day. I choose to make the most out of these days.
