Trans Man Struggles #1 Bathrooms
I’ve been using the men’s bathroom for about two years now, and I feel that a considerable part of my transition has been fulfilled. However, I’ve never thought I would miss the women’s bathroom. Let me explain.
Men’s bathrooms are disgusting and inconvenient for trans guys.
I don’t know what it is, but men don’t know how to use the bathroom. I always use a stall to do my business. Not only there aren’t many stalls, to begin with, but they’re also often unusable.
Piss on the seat, the floor, behind the toilet on the wall. Shit is left in the toilet, sometimes on the seat. You can’t put anything on the floor unless you want it contaminated. So many times, I’ve walked into a stall and said NOPE! I rather have my bladder burst than use that monstrosity of a toilet.
I once went to the men’s bathroom at a Target. As usual, I would wait for a stall to open up. After what seemed like an eternity, one finally opened. I went in and was met with horror. Toilet paper all over the floor and seat. Piss and shit were still in the toilet. I also think there was some piss on the floor. I did not want to sit on that toilet. I looked at the guy, who was thankfully washing his hands, and we made eye contact. I gave him a look that said, “Why, just why?” He looked at me and shrugged. He gave no fucks. All I could do was wait for another stall and pray that it was usable.
Another time, I was at the movie theater. I always use the bathroom before going into a movie. I hate leaving in the middle of a movie, especially since it was Spider-Man No Way Home (no way I was missing anything). The bathroom before the movie was just fine. Nice and clean. After the movie was a whole different story, I guess all the guys booked it to the bathroom while watching the after-credit scene because it was crowded when I got there. I went to look for a stall. Fortunately, there were accessible stalls; unfortunately, they were all in disarray. I checked every single stall and couldn’t believe that all of them were unusable. I looked weird to the other guys when I walked out without using the bathroom. I told myself I rather hold it until I got home. The funny thing is, there was a gender-neutral bathroom right next door. I noticed it when I first went to the men’s bathroom, but it didn’t occur to me to use it when I went to the bathroom a second time. I didn’t realize this until after I left the theater.
Since transitioning, I always use the men’s bathroom because of how much gender euphoria it gives me. However, I do miss how much accessibility the women’s bathroom provided. I also forgot that most places nowadays have gender-neutral bathrooms. I didn’t want to use gender-neutral bathrooms at first because I felt that it would invalidate my gender. I wanted to be like the guys and use the men’s bathroom. Though I can freely do so, I think I might solely use the gender-neutral bathrooms from now on unless there isn’t one. I wish I could stand and pee like cis guys; that way, I wouldn’t have to touch anything.
Well, my trans brothers, how do you guys feel about the men's bathroom. Do you only use the men’s bathroom, the gender-neutral bathroom, or alternate between the two? Any tips for using the men’s bathroom? Any STP devices you recommend? I would love to hear from you guys in the comments.
Thanks for reading!
