Sex Toy Savvy Shopping Guide

Nothing beats the excitement of opening a brand new sex toy — well, apart from using it, of course!

Opening the box and holding the toy for the first time and anticipating how it will feel is a feeling that just doesn’t get old for me!

But, with so many different brands, products, and promises of earth-shattering orgasms, it can be hard to know where to start and who to trust!

Choosing a good sex toy that leaves you glowing in a state of post-orgasmic bliss is an art form that involves knowing your body and knowing the sex toy industry.

While only you can get to know your body, I can share some sex toy knowledge to help you find yourself or your partner a toy that you won’t want to put down!

I’ll also share my tips for buying a sex toy as a gift and a sex toy shopping checklist, to help you get the best toy every time!

Different Types of Sex Toys

Ok, so obviously, I can’t go through every type of sex toy here, as we are lucky enough to live in an age where we have a staggering range of toys to tease every inch of our bodies.

Instead, we’ll take a look at some of the main categories, and I’ll throw in some of my favorites along the way for inspiration, as well as some top tips on how to use them.

This post contains affiliate links, meaning I may earn a commission if you buy a product through one of these links, but rest assured, I am only recommending sex toys I really love!

Clitoral suction stimulators

Vibrations reigned supreme in the sex toy world for so long. That was until clitoral suction stimulators came along, ripping out orgasms faster than you plug in your Magic Wand!

Clit suckers use air pressure to provide indirect stimulation to both the internal and external parts of the clitoral network. The magic of this type of stimulation is that you can enjoy some serious power without overwhelming your clitoris, which is amazing for exploring multiple orgasms.

I can personally recommend the Lelo Sona 2 Cruise, which I absolutely love, but be warned, you’ll want to start on the lower settings! You can read my full review of the Lelo Sona.

Or, if you want more options, you can read the full round-up on Bedbible, where I compare the 10 best clit suckers on the market.

Pro tip: Clitoral suction stimulators are also great for nipple play. Just add some lube to the rim of the mouth and let the pulses work their magic.

External vibrators

There are so many different types of external vibrators, but two of the main ones, with some big differences, are bullet vibrators and wand vibrators.

Wand vibrators are the OGs of vibrators, and they are as powerful as it gets for a handheld sex toy. The wide head provides broad, usually very rumbly stimulation that can be enjoyed all over the body.

Bullet vibrators, on the other hand, offer pinpoint stimulation that’s perfect for targeting nerve-dense areas like the clitoris and nipples. They also vary a lot in terms of power and vibration quality.

Although it’s difficult to say that one particular sex toy is the best in its category, the We-Vibe Tango X has dominated the world of bullet vibrators, as its predecessor, the We-Vibe Tango, did before it.

While I haven’t been lucky enough to get my hands on one yet, it’s on my sex toy wishlist! My colleague Rachel tested one out, and let’s say it was love at first vibe! Read her full review of the Tango X to find out if this could be the bullet vibe for you!

Pro tip: Experiment with your bullet vibrator by lying it flat between your labia to get more broad stimulation.

Dildos

We are spoilt for choice when it comes to choosing a dildo with so many different sizes, shapes, and designs to choose from. Here are my top things to consider when shopping for a dildo

• Size — Do you want something similar to the average-sized penis, or do you crave something bigger to fulfill your fantasies? Just make sure your eyes aren’t bigger than your appetite!
• Materials — Always look for a non-porous, non-toxic material, such as silicone, glass, or metal. Rigid materials are fantastic for massaging the g-spot/internal clitoris or prostate (p-spot).
• Shape and texture — The more pronounced the textural details are, the more intense they will feel, especially if the dildo is made of a more rigid material.
• Realism — Do you prefer something ultra-realistic, a less representational option, or even a fantasy dildo that looks like it just landed from a distant planet?
• Is it for anal play? If so, make sure it has a flared base to stop it from being fully inserted.

While I can’t suggest a dildo from every category, I feel it’s my duty to all the dildo lovers out there to recommend the VixSkin Mustang from Vixen Creations. I have the tye-die version and love it SO much! It’s the only dildo I own that can get me hot and bothered just thinking about it! Read my review where I wax lyrical about this tie-dye dream dildo!

Pro tip: If you have a glass or metal dildo, you can heat it or cool it in the water for some thrilling temperature play.

Sleeves and masturbators

Penis pleasing toys are finally catching up in terms of design and variety and now there is a huge range of penis stroking toys with every texture imaginable. Whether you prefer the control of a manual stroker or a high-tech automatic stroker that does all the work from start to finish, there’s plenty to choose from!

For the tech lovers out there, the Keon from Kiiroo is about as advanced as it gets when it comes to the masturbatory arts! With a top speed of 230 strokes per minute, this is an absolute masturbation machine! But that’s not all, the Keon can link up to your favorite VR porn and has a customizable stroke length, so you get exactly what you want every time!

Pro tip: Wedge your manual stroker between two pillows, secured together with a belt or strap for a hands-free experience.

Couples Toys

Sex toys are a great way to spice up partner sex or add in some much-needed clitoral stimulation for the vulva owners out there! While almost any toy can be enjoyed with a partner, some really shine when shared.

C-shape vibrators are my absolute favorite for couples with a penis and a vulva as they are totally hands-free and provide stimulation for both partners. They are everything I ever wanted in a vibrating penis ring but never found!

I loved the rumbly vibrations and squeeze remote of the We-Vibe Chorus — it was the hands-free stimulation I’d always dreamed of during PIV sex!

Strap-on kits are another versatile couple’s toy. Whether it’s for vulva-vulva sex or pegging, strap-ons are a great way to explore penetration when you don’t have a penis. If you haven’t tried a strap-on before, I’d recommend starting with a standard harness style, as these offer the most support.

The Tracey Cox Supersex Strap-On Pegging Kit comes with everything you need to start your strap-on sex adventure, including two different-sized silicone dildos!

Pro tip: Shop for sex toys together, so you get something that excites you both, and you can enjoy the anticipation together!

Anal toys (plugs, beads, prostate massagers)

Anal play is still an unexplored pleasure playground for some. But, if you are butt curious, there are so many great first-time anal toys to choose from!

Anal beads provide a lot of stimulation without being too thick, making them a fantastic choice for beginners. The stimulation comes from the movement of the beads, creating a delicious rippling feeling.

Butt plugs offer a sensation of fullness and are great for wearing during sex or even as a sexy secret as you go about your day! Throw in some vibrations for tush-tingling sensations!

I was lucky enough to test the b-Vibe Snug Plug 3 recently and can definitely recommend it if you are looking for a plug to wear as a sexy secret while you go about your day!

Pro tip: Remove your anal beads just as you orgasm to give your climax a turbo boost!

Interactive/long-distance sex toys

The latest developments in sex tech have focussed on enhancing intimacy, no matter the distance between you and your partner. App-enabled, long-distance sex toys kept us connected even when the pandemic kept us apart, and this trend is only continuing.

Now there are app-enabled versions of all our favorite sex toys, including some pretty great wearables for discreet play on the go! Not only can a partner control your sex toy from anywhere in the world, but now your sex toys can interact, responding to movements in each other’s sex toys.

Lovense currently has three interactive sex toys — the Lovense Max and Calor for penis owners and the Lovense Nora for people with vulvas. Once connected, either partner can take the lead, or you can both interact with each other at the same time!

Pro tip: Long-distance sex toys are also perfect for exploring power play by surrendering control of the toy to your partner, giving them complete control of your pleasure. You can also throw in some restraints for some real submission!

Which sex toys make the best gifts?

As someone who loves sex toys, getting a sex toy as a gift from a partner is a massive turn-on that shows they are invested in our sex life and my pleasure. However, not everyone will feel the same way and that’s totally ok!

Sex and sex toys are both very intimate subjects, and everyone has very different attitudes towards sex toys, so I would only recommend buying a sex toy for someone if they have expressed a desire for one.

Also, if you thought choosing a sex toy for yourself is hard, choosing a sex toy for someone else is next-level difficult — I would say almost on par with buying jeans for someone else! However, the better you know the person and their turn-ons, the easier it will be.

And if your partner has been dropping some subtle (or not so subtle) hints about wanting a sex toy and you want to oblige, but you feel completely lost in the sex toy jungle, you can always buy a gift card or shop for a new toy together.

Here are my top tips for picking a new sex toy for a partner:

1. Think about the types of toys they already own and the types of stimulation they enjoy during sex.
2. Consider whether you want a toy to use together, something for them to enjoy solo, or a long-distance sex toy to spice up long-distance sex.
3. Consider your partner’s kinks. If they have shared certain kinks with you, consider buying them an accessory to explore that kink together.
4. Unless you are absolutely sure your partner wants something insertable, I would avoid buying dildos, butt plugs, or anything else where size really matters. If you are buying something insertable, stick to an average-sized toy, unless they have specifically asked for something bigger or smaller.
5. If you are shopping for a friend and you aren’t sure of their preferences, don’t get too adventurous. For a person with a vulva, a clitoral vibrator or clitoral suction stimulator is a pretty safe option, and a manual stroker with a neutral design is a pretty safe bet for a penis owner.

Sex toy shopping checklist

So hopefully now you have a better idea of what you are looking for, here are some tips to make sure you get a quality sex toy that will

• Always opt for non-toxic, non-porous materials, such as silicone, glass, or metal.
• If you are shopping for an anal toy, make sure it has a flared base.
• Always double-check the measurements, especially for insertable sex toys. Some websites list the diameter (measured across a cross-section), and some list the circumference (measurement around the outside), so be sure to check.
• Get to know your anatomy and the type of stimulation you enjoy. This knowledge will help you choose a sex toy that works for your body.
• Consider the power source. Rechargeable sex toys tend to be the most popular as you don’t need to worry about needing batteries. Mains-powered sex toys are generally the most powerful but can be cumbersome to use. Battery-powered sex toys tend to be less powerful but can be handy for traveling with as you can remove the batteries.
• Shop from trusted sex toy shops that really value your safety and pleasure.
• Read the reviews. Customer reviews and expert reviews are a great way to figure out if a toy will work for you.

I hope this has inspired to you get shopping for your next sex toy. With the wonders of modern shipping, it won’t be long until you are ripping off the packaging and putting it to the test!