Spirituality Versus Religion
How to find oneself spiritually without religion
It's taken me a lifetime to get here: A place where I am finding spiritual fulfillment without religion. I've been through many religions in study and in practice, and I am much richer for having done it, but ultimately, finding myself spiritually had to be a personal journey, not a religious one.
The problems with religion on the individual level are the same ones we see playing out now on the national level: limiting dogmatic beliefs; certainty one has "the truth"; willingness to force "the truth" on others for their own and society's good. Our current democratic breakdown may be directly attributable, at least in part, to these issues, as we see a religious base and a Supreme Court willing to enforce their beliefs with the legal power of the state.
For me, the spiritual journey has been a lifelong quest. I've always been fascinated with learning to be content with who I am, learning to make wise decisions, understanding (to the extent we are able) how the universe works; wanting to connect with god and others in the spiritual dimension. Consequently, I've studied psychology off and on, and I've studied and practiced multiple religions: Transcendental Meditation, Self-Realization Fellowship, Zen, Insight Meditation, Pentecostal and Evangelical Christianity, Catholicism, and New Age.
Surprisingly, I've discovered all these religions and even psychology to an extent have some things in common:
- A sense of social belonging and a social network, if you want that.
- Dogma, doctrine, rules — All expect disciples to learn and follow the "rules" or the "tradition." I did not find any practice that allowed total spiritual autonomy. All will say you are mistaken at some point if you try to find your own way, deviating from their teachings, and some will even try to discipline you instead of letting you explore and discover your own path. This may be an inherent flaw of most social organizations.
- All include the wisdom that we should revere the leader (god/human/universe); love one another; and love ourselves. Sadly, some are very bad at doing so in practice, others are much better (perhaps depending on the local leader), but all are run by fallable human beings who can unintentionally do harm. We have to give them space to be human, try not to take their behavior or the teachings too seriously, and be ready to move on if their approach consistently harms us or others.
- All recommend putting aside the ego in some way to learn unselfishness and to find our connection with god, others, nature, or universe.
- Most all of them provide good "training wheels" for learning some form of spirituality.
- All offer a path to connecting with the divine or with spirit or with wisdom that can be personally transforming. Some have brilliant mystical or spiritual traditions and deep faithfulness that can help us grow in our own beliefs and practice.
So what's the problem with religion, or is there a problem? Well, nationally we've seen the problems play out in the recent role of religion in stripping away women's rights. The belief that religion has the perfect truth and everybody must follow that truth, voluntarily or by force, is the biggest problem with religion on every level. At the level of the individual, their doctrine and rules will hamper your ability to follow your own personal path as you are inwardly led, and on the social level, they will try to enforce their will on an unwilling majority. This is an intolerable problem, both spiritually and socially.
Each of us must have the autonomy to work out our own path by our own lights. That is the essence of spiritual and civic freedom. On an individual level, if you admit your path is diverging from theirs, most religions will at least try to convince you you're mistaken, they may "discipline" you, or they may ostracize you. At the social level, religionists may use political power to enforce their will, even to the point of sending you to prison for crimes against their faith that they manage to codify into law.
Having tried religion and found these social pressures to be more or less universal, I've found it much more fulfilling to go my own way spiritually. I look for the teachings I believe I need and grow in my own way and at my own pace. I no longer join anything. My path has brought deep spiritual satisfaction, and for that I'm grateful to every faith I've tried. I learned wise teachings from each. But if I had it to do over, I'd have never joined and would have remained a visitor so I could enjoy what they offer but feel free to follow my own path, moving among teachers and teachings as I felt led. That's what I'm doing now, and it's very deeply spiritual and meaningful without the baggage and hindrance of doctrines or rules.
On a national level, the founders had it absolutely right when they established a First Amendment right of freedom from a state religion. None of us should have any obligation whatsoever to live our lives according to someone else's religion, and politically, we should have no obligation to our own religion either. It's a spiritual path, not spiritual bondage, and we must be completely free to act in the personal and civic arenas as we feel is right, as we feel we are led, regardless of what our religion or someone else's teaches.
