The Unbalanced
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The Unbalanced

The Most Finalisty Final Four Breakdown on the Internet

Soothsaying the final steps toward a shining moment

  1. The officiating was garbage. Sure, Gonzaga made it’s first final four (more on that later) but it may have done so because one of their players was able to reach up through the basket like my dad used to do when playing me on a nerf hoop. That move always made me try to dunk through his stupid fingers. It also made me rage-cry. All that to say, I get it Chris Collins.
  2. Kansas lost. I realize this may only be “awful” to a certain subset of people. However Kansas lost in a horrible fashion which contradicted their play to that point. They scored over 90 points in each of their first three games. They appeared to be the most fun team in the field. Then they pooped on their shoes. The loss wrapped up Frank Mason’s college career, who went from Towson recruit to probable POY. It also wrapped up Landon Lucas’ college career, who plays defense as though someone hit him with the petrificus totalus charm.
  3. Duke lost. LOL. Kidding.
  4. The play has not been stellar. *Charles Barkley voice* “The lack of fundamentals these kids display is turrible.” Could any of these teams hang with 2001 Duke? Or 2005 Carolina? Or 2012 Kentucky? No. They could not. Also, get off my lawn.





Sports, Culture, and Game of Thrones

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