Growing Up In A Christian School
What I’ve Picked Up In The Past Decade —
By: N. Mozart Diaz
Attending a Christian School, at least where I live, already sport a number of stereotypes set up for each of the students. It is said that the boys are weak little killjoys that attend youth services and nothing else; the girls are raised and indoctrinated as nuns and mothers — and that the faculty will annihilate anyone who thinks they’re in between the two sexes. Some of these stereotypes are true — though I’m not saying which ones.
Growing up behind closed fences and being indoctrinated to believe that the world out there was dirty and sinful led me to ostracize myself from activities beyond the Christian realm. Young and naive as I was, I would’ve believed everything that came out of a teacher’s mouth.
That’s what school really is — indoctrination rather than education. True education is picked up along the way, all school does is indoctrinate young minds to behave in the society we live in.
(But of course, that’s just my opinion on school.)
There were many things the school taught me. As it taught me to love, be brave, true, and noble, it also taught me to hate blindly, shun romantic relationships, and to ostracize fellow students if they acted ‘wrongly.’ As they taught me about the sins and abominations of this world, it accidentally taught me to lie, manipulate, and work my way into getting what I wanted. Christian indoctrination inadvertently taught me to be afraid of society and those who were not like us. It introduced me to Islamophobia, vicious homophobia, everyday sexism, and prejudice in general.
As they taught me about how Jesus loved, they taught me to fear the world. They filtered what they showed us, they filtered what we listened to, what we wore, what we said, what we read, what we thought. There was not one part of us they left private. The teachers were law, and their interpretation of Scripture was absolute — anyone who thought otherwise were quickly removed.
Of course, any system is flawed as long as it is run by humanity, and they had good intent, but good intent turns bad when they force it down your throat.
(Take European Colonization for example, but that’s a post for another time)
You had to agree with everything they said or stay silent. That’s how it is. Agree or fail. Agree or fail. There is no middle ground. The school was to be pure, preppy, and the epitome of Christian Education — any blemish found was to be removed.
Eventually, since the faculty felt the right to peek into our personal lives at any moment, the sense of privacy also diminished. The students and teachers, each terrified of each other.
At the end of my stay there, I left with a series of fears and prejudices. I got my education, my friends, my talents and skills. Outside sources helped me balance my ideologies, thankfully, but the way I was indoctrinated forces me to think twice.
The school had good intent, of course it did, but I believe that they were so concerned with the trivialities of Christianity that they forgot its core values. They ostracized us from the world because it was sinful. They forgot that Jesus ate and stayed in the presence of the worst sinners in his time. They taught us to snitch when a fellow student did wrong, promising rewards, they forgot to elaborate on forgiveness and acceptance of others.
So maybe some stereotypes are right. That teaching some parts of the Bible are horrifyingly out of date in our modern setting. Being in a Christian school teaches you virtues, but it accidentally teaches as many bad things as it does good. But, hell, isn’t that every other school? I’d like to believe so.
Attending a Christian school taught me, most especially, to watch what I believe in. That what I believe is important. It taught me to create my own moral code. The Bible is a good outline, it’s a good thing to base ideas on, but to use it as a tool for hate doesn’t roll with me.
That’s what it taught me, to be careful in the world around me.
