Is LeBron James A Robot?
This is the second article of a five-part series I will be writing called “Deep Dive”. This is essentially an excuse for me to do way too much research and write extensively about topics in the realm of sports that don’t get talked about much in the larger sports media because they’re too strange for ESPN to do a segment on them. That’s why I’m here: to bring the public the stories that matter (to me).
I believe that Cleveland Cavaliers star LeBron James is a robot, not a human. You can call me crazy, but I’ve seen enough Black Mirror episodes to know that this is where society is going. In fact, lifelike robots are already a part of our lives.
Before you start doubting me, hear me out. Haven’t you ever believed something that seems so incredibly wild and unlikely, yet the fantastical nature of it made you even more sure of your conviction? And did its inconceivable aspect also make it impossible for others to disprove your belief, therefore strengthening your position?
(I imagine this is how Kyrie Irving feels about his flat Earth theory. Same goes for Alex Jones and his ideas about the government putting chemicals in water that turns frogs gay. I suppose I’m not in the best company.)
Why do I think the King is a robot? I’m glad you asked. Check out this table showing LeBron’s career averages:
(If you don’t know what some of these statistics mean, click here to go to LeBron’s Basketball Reference page and you can go to the glossary above the tables.)
In his 15th season, LeBron is putting up perhaps the best overall statistics of his illustrious career. He’s averaging career highs in assists, effective field goal percentage, 2-point field goal percentage, and free throw percentage. He’s close to career highs in blocks, rebounds, and 3-point field goal percentage. And he’s averaging his most points per game since the 2009–10 season, when he was 25 and won MVP. At a time when he’s supposed to start declining, James is equal to or better than his career averages in nearly every statistical category. And he’s doing it in the third fewest minutes of his career. Nothing changes when you look at his advanced numbers:
His 30.3 Player Efficiency Rating would rank among the 20 greatest seasons of all time and his .645 True Shooting Percentage is the second best of his career.
I always thought LeBron was at his best during the 2012 and 2013 seasons when he won back-to-back championships and MVPs in Miami. He was 27 and 28, the common peak for perimeter players, and at the height of his athletic powers. But look at his numbers this season as compared to each of his MVP seasons:
By just about every metric, LeBron matches up to his four best seasons as a professional. And he’s 33. And he’s in his 15th season. What?!
Let’s compare LeBron’s 15th season to those of some past stars who were notable for their longevity.
These are all-time greats we’re talking about, and in many respects, LeBron is blowing them out of the water. LeBron leads the group in points, assists, field goal percentage, 3-point percentage, effective field goal percentage, and is second in rebounds. None of the other five players put up the overall stats LeBron has.
But wait, it gets better. Here are LeBron’s 15th season per game averages vs his career numbers:
Here are Kareem’s:
And Kobe’s:
Garnett’s:
Malone’s:
And Pierce’s:
Only LeBron, Kobe, Malone, and Pierce had undeniably equal or better numbers in their 15th season as in their career. Let’s strike Pierce from the group since his stats simply don’t match the others’. Now check the 15th season advanced stats vs. those of the career for LeBron:
Kobe:
And Malone:
Now consider that, save for a few areas, taking the best advanced numbers from Kobe AND Malone still wouldn’t stack up to the season LeBron is having. This level of dominance in a 15th season is unprecedented. And it’s not as though he doesn’t pass the eye test. LeBron can still take over a game with his scoring,
completely dominate the proceedings while only taking 13 shots,
and use his athleticism to provide us with highlights galore:
LeBron has been to seven straight finals, reached at least the second round of the playoffs 12 straight years, and played in three Olympics. You’d think that after playing so much basketball, he’d have some wear and tear. Nope. The most games he’s missed in a regular season is 13. He’s never had a major injury or missed a playoff game. That’s unbelievable.
Think about it. Kobe missed more than 13 games five times in the seasons before he tore his Achilles. Jordan broke his foot and took almost two years off to play baseball. Bird and Magic had their careers cut short for different reasons. LeBron is indestructible, and that’s a huge part of why he could become the greatest of all time when he decides to retire. No one has played as much basketball for as long a time uninterrupted at this level.
The only explanation is that he’s a robot. His inner circle may release stories that say otherwise, like the claims that James spends $1.5 million per year on his body (sounds like just the right amount to maintain a basketball-playing robot), but we should know better. If we’re not careful, such a powerful machine could take over the world. I’m onto you LeBron.
(Or should I say, LeTron)
