Starting a blog
Part 2
OK… So why vagabonding?
“Vagabonding is about gaining the courage to loosen your grip on the so-called certainties of this world.” vagabonding
When I contemplated making this move in my life, I had to project myself to the future and take an honest assessment of where my life was headed.
I was 25, and the way my life was set up, I projected this certain Life Narrative:
- Continuing slaving my way as a math tutor for a few years.
- Opening a tutoring school and expanding my business.
- At some point, finding a life partner and attach myself, not only to a place and a career path, but to a person as well.
- Being 35, wondering what the fuck happened.
- There is no 5… it ends here.
I felt as if my capacity to be flexible was leaving me, and if I didn’t make a radical change, I would wake up in a year or two from now without the strength to start this journey.
“Vagabonding is about taking control of your circumstances instead of passively waiting for them to decide your faith.” vagabonding
I had many desires in me growing up: learning languages, travel the world and experience other cultures, connecting with people from different places, and discovering “tribes” that I can relate to.
Every day/week/year that had passed, I felt that I was loosing energy to initiate changes in my life.
Learning Spanish? traveling? meeting people and having a social existence? Nothing happened! and no changes were even beginning to happen in a pace that could satisfy my hunger for life.
I knew I had to create circumstances that will be conducive to the things I want to experience in my life. Within the previous setup (being a math tutor, living in my apartment in Tel Aviv), I would continue be powerless.
Creating new circumstances, was the only thing that could give me the freedom to be creative and fulfilled.
“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.” George Bernard Shaw
I know this quote comes up when addressing circumstances..
This isn’t about blaming the circumstances I was in.
This is about owning up to the fact, that I spent my life trying to fit myself into the wrong environment, and way of living.
This is about changing that environment, and moving in the direction of my desires.
No blame, just action.
It’s all on me. It’s my responsibility to change.
I never felt at “home” where I grew up. Never felt belonged to anything around me: people, institutions, the culture.. just not for me.
I’m traveling to explore, to discover other places, and communities.
Rather than accept my life situation and trying to conform to it (and failing miserably for years…), I decided to change everything, and make sure I never settle for a life that makes me feel like I exist, but far from alive.
“This cup wants to be empty again.” Friedrich Nietzsche (Thus Spoke Zarathustra)
Exactly Nietzsche… preach on.. this cup wants to be empty again! now let’s start(:
Traveling
“ Vagabonding is about refusing to exile travel to some other, seemingly more appropriate, time of your life.” vagabonding
I always wanted to travel, but was conditioned to think that traveling is about slaving away for a year, and then fly to a weekend in Rome to compensate. (Never had a weekend in Rome by the way, if anyone is offering…)
Traveling broken down by Rolf
“ For some reason, we see long term travel to faraway lands as a recurring dream or an exotic temptation, but not something that applies to the here and now. Instead — out of our insane duty to fear, fashion, and monthly payments in things we don’t really need — we quarantine our travels to short, frenzied bursts. In this way, as we throw our wealth at an abstract notion called “lifestyle”, travel becomes just another accessory — a smooth-edged, encapsulated experience that we purchase the same way we buy clothing and furniture .” vagabonding
If you got up and cheered for a second while reading this passage from “vagabonding”, your’e in good company! (even clapping is acceptable)
Rolf puts into words what I believe many of us feel, but have no idea how to start approaching.
“Research your own experiences for the truth…. absorb what is useful… add what is specifically your own… the creating individual is more than any style or system” Bruce lee (vagabonding)
Traveling is a vehicle of change, more powerful than any other agent I know of.
People asked me: “what are you looking for?” and “I hope you find what your looking for” comments were made everyday.
I was met with people who are either condescending, afraid, ignorant, confused, or all of those together.
Most people, have no idea how powerful of a medicine is traveling.
You explore places in yourself, more than physical ones.
You explore your boundaries, your values, your behaviors, and anything that composes who you are.
If you want to grow, travel. Period.
What I experienced in Europe, was undeniably the best time of my life.
I experienced the most consistent levels of happiness that I ever knew.
I grew in almost 3 months, the most I’ve ever had.
For 25 years, I was struggling with many issues in my personality: my capacity to engage and interact with the world.
Traveling unleashed parts of myself that were dormant, silent, just waiting for the right context to emerge.
And I had…. by far… the most fun I’ve ever had!
To give up this tool now, or put it back in the drawer, would be a crime against my well being and happiness.
I got a taste of the potential powers of traveling, and now I want to drink the whole ocean. I want to be transformed by it.
For how long? until when?
I have no idea.
It would be equivalent to someone asking me for how long do I want to be happy or fully alive.. as much as possible.
This is about grabbing the wheel of my life with both hands, and going on the ride of my life.
Seeking, searching, looking… these are all signs of health!
What am I seeking for?
TO BE A SEEKER
The following quotes are from Yann Girard’s blog, ‘Thought Pills’:
“We were and are being pushed into a system, into a way of thinking that kills pretty much everything that defines most of us. It kills the explorer. The hunter. The gatherer.”
“A system that wants us to choose what we want to do for the rest of our lives. When our lives have barely even started yet. It’s just impossible.” I’m everywhere and nowhere. And I own nothing and everything
I would put 10 clapping breaks here…!
Yann says it perfectly, It kills the explorer by making us choose one path and follow it for the rest of our lives.
There Is No Road
I have no idea what path I will take.
The road will emerge out of the process of exploring that I’m cultivating, and will keep changing constantly.
“Traveler, there is no path” by Antonio Machado:
“Wanderer, your footsteps are
the road, and nothing more;
wanderer, there is no road,
the road is made by walking.
By walking one makes the road,
and upon glancing back
one sees the path
that must never be trod again.
Wanderer, there is no road
Only wakes upon the sea.”
Transformation
For years I’ve been consuming immense amounts of content via: books, articles, videos, documentaries…
And for years I’ve been struggling with this question:
How do I go from consuming content to creating content!?
This blog, is the start of my transformation towards creating my own content.
And as the great poet Homer Simpson says:
Let’s start failing and a lot!
So I can get to anywhere new, anywhere fulfilling and exciting.. I have to start failing(:
Taking massive action is the key for this journey, and within massive action there will be massive failures and challenges.
“There is too much motivation and not enough execution in the world” Gary Vaynerchuk
This is my time to execute.
