5 Ways Rock Climbing Helps Me Function in Every Day Life
After experiencing domestic violence and abuse
1. I’m learning to trust again
After I experienced domestic violence and sexual abuse, I lost all ability to trust myself and other people. In rock climbing I must trust my belayer to pay attention and catch me if I fall. I also need to trust my feet to stay on the rock, my hands to grab the right hold, and my mind to remember how to clip the rope through the quickdraws correctly. Trust doesn’t grow overnight, and I still experience moments of pure terror. However, I’m lucky to have belayers who understand what I’ve been through, and are super supportive and patient.
2. I’m active
It’s been 11 months and yet there are still days when I struggle to get out of bed, cook food, do chores, socialise with friends, and work. I am a hard worker and self-motivator, but after my trauma, sometimes I can’t start let alone complete basic tasks. I call these ‘mental health days’.
Sometimes on these days, I manage to drag myself to the climbing gym. I cycle to the gym and when I reach the river and feel the breeze hit my face, I feel better already. At the gym I chat to my belay buddy and climb what I feel comfortable doing that day. Sure it’s not my best climbing, but I’m out of the apartment and doing something. Climbing helps me function a smidge better on these tough days.
3. My self worth and confidence is growing
I suffer from memory loss due to the trauma inflicted on me. What memories I do have, and the snippets that reappeared from the power of therapy, are dark and oozing with shame.
The things that happened to me often make me feel guilty, ashamed and gross. My self worth was at an all time low before I started rock climbing regularly. Now when I climb I feel a sense of accomplishment which levels up my self confidence and self worth.
4. I’m learning how to treat myself
I buy rock climbing gear for myself. Just recently I bought some new climbing shoes because my old ones got a hole in the toe.
In the past all my money went to the relationship, and my ex-partner. Birthdays, shoes, dinners, homehold items, flights, and more. I often had little to no money left over for me. I remember sacrificing eating so I could pour more money into the relationship. And yet I still didn’t feel like I was doing enough for my ex or the relationship. This just shows how manipulated I was, and how little control I had over my finances.
Now that I’m free from the relationship and my ex, my money is my own. When I buy something for me I do a little happy dance. It’s still hard for me to treat myself because I’m not used to it and I feel guilty. But I’m getting better at it, and rock climbing is giving me a good reason to spend more money on myself!
5. I get a constant reminder of how far I’ve come
I’m climbing way harder than I was at the start. All my climb buddies have commented on how my confidence has grown and my strength has increased, since we started climbing together.
Just last week I was rock climbing outdoors and did my first lead climb! This week I did my first knee bar!
I’m getting better at rock climbing, and it’s proof my mind is stronger too. I feel more resilient. I feel brave for stepping outside my comfort zone each time I climb, whether it’s indoor or out at the crag.
I’ve still got a long way to go before I feel 100% back to normal. Maybe I’ll never feel “normal” again. But rock climbing, alongside therapy, is helping me function a lot better in everyday life. And I’m proud of that!
