“You’re Turning Women Into Victims”

No, I’m calling out sexism

Photo by Jackson David on Unsplash

I’ve written before about the words and phrases used to silence women who stand up to sexism and misogyny. Among them is the idea that talking about the problem makes victims out of women. I’m told “You can’t live your life this way”, and “I refuse to be limited like this” by those who want to derail the conversation, but also by women who don’t appear to be trying that. Doesn’t mean I understand where they’re coming from though.

There seem to be several ideas going on at once:

• It’s usually said as a reprimand.
• These women claim never to allow the offense to happen to them, implying either that it doesn’t happen or the women who experience it are lacking.
• I'm somehow letting women down by calling out sexism and misogyny.
• It’s the opposite of empowering because I’m depicting women as victims.
• Being a victim of sexism or misogyny is a negative.

Let’s unpack.

I refuse to be a victim

The reality is that girls and women experience sexism or misogyny in every walk of life, at every time of the day and night. We are victims. The general definition of ‘victim’ is “a person harmed, injured, or killed as a…