A Shortcut for Insight and Finding Tigress Teammates

Blue Lagoon, Iceland Trip 2016

Skiing for a week in late January at Bridger Bowl felt great but kicked-mah-ass.

I’m back in Helena, MT, through mid-April, a quaint town that backs up to a small mountain named after the town. Or vice versa? I’m not sure. When I woke up still sore the third day after I got home, it reminded me to look up some local hot springs.

I’ve been fortunate to visit several hot springs — in California, Iceland, and Mexico. A 3 a.m. spiritual experience in a super hot pool in NorCal was a definite fork in my life’s road. I highly recommend a hot springs retreat as an option for the symbolic rebirth experience on your Way of the Tigress Outer Journey.

Montana has hot springs, too. Just another item on the list of it’s overwhelming abundance of natural goodies. This must seem unfair to states like Nebraska and Iowa. No fair! Montana has mountains AND volcanic activity too! All we got back in the day was tons of bison poop from passing herds.

So that was today’s outing — Wednesday morning workout and hot springs soak where I had the whole gym and pool practically to myself. All for $10, with a view of the mountains on the drive to and fro. I miss NYC but shoot dang, the frontier has its advantages.

What Most Self-Help Books Don’t Tell Us

As I was sitting in the steaming water heated by the earth’s inner fire, thinking how surreal it feels to stumble across a health club with ancient thermal hot springs attached, I was tempted to feel guilty about spending a Wednesday morning this way. Then something occurred to me.

The better I take care of myself, physically and mentally, the better my decisions are. That sounds obvious, but it’s more than eating well and exercising, which is where I plateaued for a few years. It’s about checking how you feel in your body, not just doing stuff to it or with it.

As Tigresses, we have difficulty relaxing unless we are powerfully aligned with our path. There are reams of books and millions of websites to help us with “mindset,” find our purpose, Call, strategy, or life plan. Lots of help “figuring it out.”

I have studied and gained a lot of value from books and teachings like that. But hardly any of them talk about a shortcut you may know about; I didn’t know until recently.

What is missing in most self-help content is an emphasis on breaking down the mental separation between our mind, body, and surroundings. In plainer terms, they don’t teach enough about the importance of moving your body in fun or challenging ways and treating yourself to immersive physical experiences.

To trust our intuition, we first have to be able to hear it. We have to clear mental space for our inner voice to get a word in edgewise. Meditation helps, but that’s still a mental focus — our mind can go into overtime resisting mediation, too.

There is an easier way to create some non-verbal space in your mind. I don’t think it takes the place of seated meditation, or maybe it can? I don’t know, but mindful movement is a powerful complement.

This can look like an exercise routine, but it is not the same. Using workout time to mull over our problems at home or with work does not give us any mental space. As far as your Body is concerned, it doesn’t have your attention. It will go through the motions, but you won’t experience any opening of insights because all your attention is over with your bossy left-brain problem-solving mode.

Focusing on your movements can lead to flashes of insight and better decision-making later. This is why people experience great ideas in the shower, after a walk, or first thing in the morning. Have you ever been struggling with a decision, and the answer is so clear after a walk or a workout? Yes, that feels right. Or, Hell no, what was I thinking?

The Connection Behind Our Connecting

As movement helps you have more insights to guide you on your path, it also changes the “You” you are bringing to the Hunt. You are more centered and focused. This is attractive energy in a distracted world.

I read an interview once with one of Stephen King’s sons. When he was growing up, he wondered if his parents were normal because they spent so much time alone in their respective home offices. None of his friends’ parents were writers or worked at home, so I imagine that it did seem odd back then.

As an introvert and entrepreneur with a full schedule and no “home base” right now, I have to be intentional and choosy about opportunities to interact with other humans. It’s good for me and essential for my business.

My current Way of the Tigress Intention is Connection. When I first chose it, I was thinking of business connections. Monkey Mind laughed when I left NYC, the epicenter of the Web3 scene. I hadn’t been to decent networking events in about two years, and just as I was starting to meet some people, I had to leave. I admit I was bummed. Who the hey you gonna meet in Montana?

(If you aren’t familiar with the term Monkey Mind, it's a Buddhist term referring to the stream of consciousness, restless, distracted inner chatter we all experience. Inner Critic is another common word for it.)

I got over it. I know better — it’s not always about the where. For starters, I met some fascinating women on the ski trip. And it turns out there are some surprising rumblings about crypto and blockchain out here in the Wild West as well.

When I set my Tigress intention to level up my connections, I think my subconscious (as usual) took a more expansive view and saw a green light to nurture the mind-body connection too. Hot springs, a quiet casita in a quaint snowy town — it’s like the prescription I didn’t know I needed.

We can’t completely silence Monkey Mind, but if we let it lead who we talk to and what we say, we attract relationships that thrive in an echo chamber of anxiety, run around, and wasting time, aka drama.

That is heaven for Monkey Mind and our ego. It’s hell for the Tigress.

Alignment is another word for it. We attract people aligned with what we are putting out there. When we work on our inner connection, the person we bring to outer conversations and decisions is more aligned with our true self, not a role, persona, or ego.

We experience more inner calm, because like I said, as Tigresses, we have a hard time relaxing unless we are powerfully aligned with our path.

Put another way, I can easily scan Linkedin and create a networking strategy, but if the “me” I’m bringing to the party is not connected to my inner Self, I won’t make much traction meeting or attracting the right people aka Tigress teammates.

To bring it full circle, time for movement and hot springs is not goofing off; it is a shortcut to that inner connection. I went back to my place, ate lunch, worked a bit, and that night I slept 9 hours for the first time in weeks.

Question for you: How many Monkey Mind friends do you have vs. Tigress teammates in your life? I’m not here to judge. I had a very good childhood, yet I grew up 100% around people led by Monkey Mind. I have family and friends I love who still lead with Monkey Mind.

It doesn’t mean I cut them out of my life (unless they turn toxic or mean). I may limit time with them if I’m tired, but usually, I hold space in a non-judgemental way.

Being with them gives my inner Tigress a chance to observe how their Monkey Mind activates mine. Then I get to choose what my response is. Often I don’t have to say anything at all. Just being present is a powerful way to practice staying mentally strong and compassionate.

Bundle up, get moving and have a great week, Tigresses! Give your Self a hug from me on Valentine’s Day!



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store