Millennials -> Snake People
You could power a small country just with the heat generated by online hand-wringing about millennials. Fortunately, you can improve all those awful news stories with the fabulous Chrome extension “Millennials to Snake People.” It changes all instances of the word Millennials to the much better term Snake People and as a bonus, changes The Great Recession to The Time of Shedding and Cold Rocks.
The most fun is when you forget you’ve installed it and suddenly you see a headline like “Why socialism would be disastrous for Snake People” and you lose your mind trying to figure out whether this is a conspiracy theory Reddit made up or a scientific paper about the production of skin in reptiles. Here are some other examples of times the extension made my life better:
Most Snake People aren’t that into avocado toast.
That’s obvious. They much prefer bugs and small rodents.
3 reasons Snake People are timid leaders
#1: Not enough of their coworkers speak parseltongue.
Yes, Birth Order Matters. Especially for Leading Snake People at Work
Because sometimes the mom eats the first born. Sorry, it’s not all good times and small rodents for snake people. It’s a tough life.
How Snake People are reinventing the priesthood
Let me guess, by being much more trustworthy around children?
Cereal makers hope to charm Snake People, not just kids
SNAKE PEOPLE LOVE BEING CHARMED