The Weight of Desire | Poetry
An enhancement of selflessness
A poetic reflection on my human flaws
I’ve titled myself as a keener kind of human for my selflessness towards nature and the globe that contains it. Yet I’m sickened with this species’ flaws too: Overcome with greed like any other, in distinct forms of love, talent and yes, power.
My eyes, blue as they might be, are seductive. My skin, with its alien glow is false. My hair, golden, is a mask that hides stupidity. My tongue twisting alluringly around the ears of men tells lies. It’s a Venus fly trap for my own flying.
I could turn to the watchful eyes of Gods in search of perfection. In multitude, of course, for there are many with redeeming qualities. And like many of my predecessors have done before me, I could repel my sins away and store them in wooden boxes, finished gracefully with religious scenery.
But why? It’s always these why’s who have the sharpest question marks. And those because’s that leave you more questioning. I know why. All of this for soothing words referring to beauty. For the gaze upon my flesh, mouthwatering. For being the unlike you’ve ever seen before.
I reveal myself to you. Shockingly and bravely, I caught my own reflection for a moment and reflected its image for everyone to see. I’m selfish for wanting something I can’t have. For wanting too much, too many.
The illness of wanting to be liked is a deceiving one. The urge to earn the best spot in the eyes, and hearts, of your fellow kind. A battle hard and often deceitfully fought as the mating game. But now a question arises: Am I the deceiving one? Or am I the deceived one? Empty-handed but thick with blood that’s on my hands.
I watch myself in metacognition. It’s an improvement of evolution. My robotic motion for doing things in a loop is tiring and helpless. I save and add data to my being, unable yet wishing to delete. I learn. I laugh with it. At it. I sigh. Deeply. I command. Control. I enter a new line:
I’m flawed for I am human.
