Member-only story
THE WIND PHONE
Calling To Say Goodbye to the Dead
I just called to say I love you
When someone dies, all communication ends, or does it? I’m finding out that just because someone isn’t alive anymore doesn’t mean you can’t speak the words you need to say.
I was 28 when my father had a heart attack in the middle of a sporting goods store in San Francisco. It was sudden, shocking, and completely unexpected. He was only 67, and I hadn’t even considered the possibility that he wouldn’t live until 90 or above. At the time, Death wasn’t a frequent visitor in my life, and I knew very little about grief and loss.
Once I got the call that he’d died, I was tasked with many things. I had to drive up North from Los Angeles, plan his funeral, and convince my schizophrenic brother that my Jewish father wasn’t and had never been a Nazi spy.
The one thing I didn’t get to do was say goodbye to my father. There were still so many conversations we needed to have. I regret that I never asked him more questions about his life. Now that he was gone, he’d never know how grateful I was to have him as my dad.
But I’m not alone in my remorse. Many people don’t get the opportunity to say goodbye while their loved ones are alive, or worse, they can say goodbye, but it isn’t a satisfying…
