Once upon a time…

How I came to be a blank page slayer.

Image by Ann San from Pixabay.

My Grandpa used to work as an electrician in a paper factory. Among other things, said factory produced these heavy pads of thick recycled paper, the kind that is really rough to the touch. Sometimes, when they didn’t come out right, my Grandpa was allowed to bring some home.

There was nothing I loved more than that almost indiscernible sound of the pencil scratching a blank page, making it come to Life.

I was never that good at drawing, so my early creations required some explaining. Out of respect for my creative efforts, Grandpa would always ask for details.

Grandpa: ‘What’s that in her hand?’

5 Year Old Me: ‘It’s a diamond. She found it in the garden.’

Grandpa: ‘Oh. And what was a diamond doing there?!’

5 Year Old Me: ‘The Pirates left it there, of course!’

Grandpa: *Confused, looking over my shoulder.* ‘I don’t see any Pirates…’

5 Year Old Me: *Sighed.* ‘They are still in my head — for now. But everybody knows that if there is a Treasure, there are Pirates!’

My Grandpa laughed, laid back in his armchair and asked what else was ‘still in my head’. He was the first person to realize I was a storyteller (and he encouraged it). The following week, he started teaching me how to write.

I was an impatient and ambitious student: I wanted to learn all the letters, so I could know all the words, so I could write all the stories! Writing was fun and I was enthusiastic about it.

Nonetheless, I didn’t become a storyteller. Not yet, at least. I have been suffering from writer’s block. And it has been going on for a while, too. Sometimes I fight it with all my Heart. Sometimes I wallow in doubt and self-pity.

To be fair, I also never quit — I sometimes say to myself that I will but soon I find myself scribbling a few thoughts down on paper whenever I feel ‘out of depth’.

What to do then? How to get out of this Limbo? Do I still have Pirates in my head? I guess the only way I will ever find out is if I keep scribbling away.

So bear with me, I am about to embark on a quest for Inspiration and a Sense of Purpose! All those in favour say ‘Aye’!