THEO-ism (Saving Chicago)

What if Theo Epstein decided to take on bigger challenges in the world of sports, politics or even World hunger? Here’s a peek at what that might look like. (Parody)

Southbend Voice/ via Flickr

I will never forget that day back in 2017. The Cubs had just won back-to-back Championships and all of Chicago was reeling. Not only had the Cubs ended the draught in 2016, but now they had cemented their names in history as a potential dynasty.

As Theo Epstein stepped to the podium we could only assume he was about to announce the next big move the Cubs would make. That is when the unthinkable happened. As all of Chicago and all of Cubs Nation watched, he stepped up announced that he would be leaving the Cubs for his next big venture.

The entire sports world would gasp in disbelief. Could it be? Could Theo really be leaving Chicago? That’s when he dropped the next bomb-shell. No he wasn’t leaving Chicago. In fact he was just moving a little ways down the road. Theo had decided to take over as General Manager of the Chicago Bears.

Some were upset, but others like myself found themselves intrigued at the idea. Is it possible that Theo could take his magic fairy dust and sprinkle a little on Soldier Field and reestablish the Bears as a contender?

At that time every reporter, fan or news writer had a million questions. Some thought it was insane. Like Skip Bayless for instance on his new show “Talking to Myself” on CBS sports.

“Look no one is saying that Theo didn't do amazing things in Chicago and Boston. However, this is no different than when Michael Jordan decided to switch to baseball. It’s a publicity stunt that will end badly and Theo will find out quickly that no one can fix the Bears.”

Others thought it was a genius idea and a bold move by Theo to test the waters like this. Take Stephen A. Smith for example on his new ESPN show “Can’t Be Stopped” talking about the move.

“All these people saying it cant be done obviously have paid zero attention to what this man has been able to accomplish. He is 100% without a doubt the best thing that ever happened to Chicago and now he will 100% without a doubt lead the Bears back to the promise land”

No matter what your opinion was back after he made the announcement, no one could have expected what this man was able to accomplish and how quickly. Let’s take a look at how we got to where we are today.

The Process

After the shock of the announcement had worn off and the NFL season came to an end after the 2017–18 season Theo officially claimed his role as GM of the Bears. Fans began to wonder what Epstein had up his sleeve? Where would he start to heal this broken franchise? Theo wasted no time at all showing the NFL that a new sheriff was in town in Chicago and his name was Theo Epstein.

After multiple failed seasons by Bears coach John Fox to lead the Bears to anything other than utter disappointment Theo made the move. Fox’s time in Chicago was over and now the search was on. The NFL analysts began to speculate as to who would be in the running for the job. The obvious names started popping up like Gruden, Cowher and some even mentioned Payton Manning. However, no one could have dreamed what Theo was about to pull off.

Theo reached back in to his old Boston connections and pulled off what many say is the most unprecedented move in sports history. Bill Belichick who had just come off his 7th Super Bowl win had decided to join up with Epstein and became the new Head Coach of the Chicago Bears.

This sent shock waves across the NFL as no one imagined that Belichick would ever leave the Patriots. When asked what drew him to Chicago Belichick had this to say.

“I really like the City of Chicago. Very nice City.”

Obviously Bill couldn't hold back the excitement he was feeling about the move. I guess you could say that he figured there was no need to get excited yet. Especially since the next move he would make would be one that no fan or reporter could have seen coming.

The Chicago Bears announced the signing of Tim Tebow as their starting quarterback. This confirmed it right? Theo had no idea what he was doing right?

However, Bears fans whom had been starving for any excitement took to Twitter to express their pleasure with the signing.

Shortly after this Belichick was asked about Tebow and in true Belichickian fashion he didn’t give us much.

Here is the general dialogue on the statement on the man who will be the most watched player on the Bears roster:

“He’s talented, he’s smart, he works hard,” Belichick said.

Then nothing.

What do you like about Tim? someone asked.
“Good kid. He’s talented, he’s smart, he works hard,” Belichick replied.

Does Tebow just need a few adjustments and can this succeed?

“We’ll see how it goes,” Belichick replied.

What interested you in Tim?

“I like Tim, I have a lot of respect for Tim,” Belichick responded Good kid.

And that was it. Reporters asked and asked and continued to get these type answers.

So we were left to wait to see how bad this was going to be. Reporters chomped at the bit to write their stories on the failure of Theo Epstein. They goaded him and the Bears organization on Nationally syndicated radio shows and even the morning talk shows got in on the action.

Little did any of us see the true genius that was taking place in Chicago. No one could have imagined that Theo Epstein must be some sort of wizard or something. A man with gifts to see things that no other man on earth can see. Who could have imagined that just two years after Theo had taken over as GM of the Bears that we would be preparing for another parade in Chicago.

That’s right, the Chicago Bears are now the NFL Super Bowl Champions and no one is doubting anymore. Theo Epstein has sealed his name in history as the greatest sports figure in history and he never even played a game in his life. It’s crazy to think that just 4 short years ago he lead the Chicago Cubs back to the top and now he put the entire City, State, Country and World on notice that nothing can stop him.

He might even be good enough to fix the Bulls. Who Knows?

Check back later and see what the next THEO-ism will be. Who knows what this man is capable of. You can also follow Craig @Craig_House3 on Twitter. In case you didn’t know all quotes are fictional, but those are real tweets.