Prologue: How Could I Plan For This?
My move to Australia was not what I expected. In January a quarter of the continent was on fire (Yeah! Remember that?!). February’s tropical rainstorms helped subdue the bushfires, but meant a lot more summer days spent indoors. By mid March, the country was closing its borders for international travel and went into lock down to slow the progression of COVID-19. What a time to move abroad!
Somewhere amidst all of this I had a breakdown. I spiraled, flung out of my element and deep into an identity crisis unsure of what I wanted or what direction I should go.
Even before the lock down, I had plenty of time to fill. I found myself doing a lot of assessing of what I want out of my life and my partnership. That’s why I chose to move here in the first place. I wanted to give myself the chance to invest in my passion and begin a life with the woman I love. My girlfriend asking me to move in with her afforded me the opportunity to live a life I had only seen in my dreams; live abroad, in love, and write. It was only when I arrived that I realized living my dreams meant facing all of my fears.
Not the surface level safe fears, like “I’m afraid of heights”, no. I mean the fears that drive you, that make you realize too late that you’ve been in the passenger seat this whole time.
It’s my turn to drive now.
