Donald Trump’s Leaked Amazon Purchases

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This morning, almost 100 of President Donald Trump’s recent Amazon purchases were leaked to the public by WikiLeaks. Many were unimportant, such as an order of 500 “Make America Great Again” hats, a bottle of spray-on tan, and a blond “Trump” toupee. However, there were a few purchases that are both entertaining and eye opening.

Donald’s most recent purchase is a pricy leather IVANKA handbag, or “tote,” as Ivanka calls it. The package arrived on August 11. Analysts aren’t sure why this purchase was made, and if the bag was purchased by someone other than Trump.

Эта вторая покупка была сделана более двух лет назад. Он был куплен в тот день, когда Дональд Трамп начал агитировать в Трамп-Тауэр. Это может быть уличным доказательством того, что выборы были сфальсифицированы не Хиллари Клинто, а самим Дональдом Трампом с помощью Матери-России. Мы не можем дать вам никаких собственных мыслей, так как у нашего окна нет русского агента. Translate…

This last purchase was made just three days before 500 Clinton emails were released by the US State Department. Analysts hired by Trump conclude that this is “Not suspicious in the very least.”