How To Get Over A Break-Up (And Other Miserable Things).
This is a New Year Special.
I hope you guys have had a great amazing year 2017, and I wish you a very Happy New Year.
I was about to post this on the 1st of January, but I have been having problems with the web hosting service, so that caused the delay.
Anyways, a new year brings a whole new world of opportunities towards your way, if you decide upon it of course. A new years resolution only works if you make it work. No matter what date you make it on, that date should be a new year for you.
Don’t worry, the title wasn’t clickbait, I’m actually going to tell you how to get over something miserable. Be it a break up or a friendship that has ended, or a job that you’ve left. Trust me, read this whole article, and you would be ready to leave behind all your miseries in the year that just left behind you.
For starters, My 2017 was great. Even though I faced a lot of miseries, like a girl who I trusted dumping me, and a 7 year old friendship coming to an end, me losing all the faith I’ve had in myself, and what not. But , I have still managed to regain all my confidence and do certain things that I think were groundbreaking for me (One of them being starting a blog like this).
Maybe your 2017 was way more amazing than mine, maybe it wasn’t. Either way, it is no use dwelling on what has happened, because no matter what happens, time won’t reverse itself. So it’s time to heal from your wounds, and strengthen yourself for what comes ahead (And Learn how to Enjoy It as well).
You’re Not Alone.
When I was dumped by a girl in early 2017, I started thinking everyone was like that. No body was as lonely as I was, nobody was as miserable as I was, what had happened to me was the worst thing that could happen to anyone. But as time passed by, and I started coming to terms with myself, I realized that what has happened to me has happened to a lot of people out there. I wasn’t the only one getting dumped, ripped off or cheated on.
There were a million people out there whose marriages have ended, whose girlfriend has left them. Someone who they loved, someone who they trusted more than anyone, has just abandoned them. It feels horrible, It’s soul crushing to open up to someone, give them everything and then they bail out on you when you need them to just be there for you. It is the worst feeling of your life. If you feel that what has happened with you is still the worst thing, I assure you it isn’t and others have been through much worse. There have been people who have lost family members and loved ones in wars, famines and the holocaust. And they’ve still fought it and emerged happier and more prosperous than ever. If you read Viktor Frankl’s Book “Man’s Search For Meaning”, You will realise that even the people who have had it worse than you have, did survive those adversities with a rock hard mindset. And so can you. Just remember that you are not alone. Everyone faces suffering.
Acknowledge the Good Around you
I’ve met several people in my life who have faced a lot of misery. Some have just faced a few, but these people give up on life. They give up on humanity. They put on a fake mask and they make themselves believe that they are the only humans alive on the planet. Thereafter,they don’t trust anyone, they’re rude and disrespectful and also very ungrateful to those around them. This class of people feel that it is best to keep distance from every person around them. Having no real connection . Just having a superficial fake relationship, with a “no emotions” attitude towards life.These people would give you the impression that they’ve seen everything there is to see in life, and the world is a crummy old place. I call these kind of people “The Fake Veterans”. You will often hear these people say things like, “I don’t care” or “I dont give a shit” every now and then. And the sad part is, they do have good friends. They do have encouraging and loving parents who support them. They have everything that a person would want in life. But just one incident or one break up puts on their faces a pretentious “Survivor” mask that isn’t really necessary. Such people suck the life out of others. If you’re even close to something like that, be aware of the toxicity you would be spreading around. Remember to acknowledge the fact that there are good people around you, who care about you, who love you and want the best for you. Don’t let one measly guy/girl ruin it for everyone. Be open and be honest, but also be grateful for what others have done for you.
They’re Not all out to get you.
When something bad happens to you, it’s easy to generalise the fact that you are a victim. The world is after you. You’re heart is a unique gem inside a golden casket and there are heartless gremlins and trolls out in the world who just love crushing your hopes and dreams. It’s not really your fault. For generations,people have believed that they are the center of the universe. Everything that happens to them is an intentional action of some god, or some political party or some idealist group or person against them. It is human nature to believe that everything happens for a reason. And that reason is somehow connected to their miserable existence. When people fell sick in the olden days, they never thought it was their own fault of their illness was a result of a natural cause. They would always think that the Gods were angry at them for no reason, or they were a lower form of existence. Its natural to think that the world revolves around you, but actually , it doesnt.
Learn To Move On.
Dealing with failure is what everyone does. Its a way of life. Its either at work, or relationships or even in marriage. You fall once in a while. Some falls are drastic, like losing a loved one . But you have to eventually give them your blessing and move on. Remember, if they are in a better place, Life gives you the choice of doing the same thing, and making a better life for yourself without them. You might have a great life ahead. Just accept what has happened, and look forward to better things. Trust me, there is always something to look forward to in life. Break ups, lay offs, divorces. Are a part of life. Sometimes shit hits the fan. Sometimes things don’t go your way. Sometimes bad things happen to good people. Accept it. Its a way of life. Bad things sometimes teach you valuable lessons. They leave you better off. They lead you on to a better life. A more enlightened perception.
Have a new Outlook towards life this New Year. That New Year can begin at any date. It doesn’t have to be January 1st. The more you make yourself open to new experience, Learn to fail and pick yourself up, the better off you would be living in a world like ours.
