Meet SVU’s Most Eligible Bachelor
By Brock Nye
Its been too many times that I have heard the words, “Dating at SVU is terrible,” or, “There are no people here worth my time.” While this school is smaller in numbers than many other universities, the amount of outstanding students that attend is off the charts. I am here to show you one of the students that makes SVU so great. Weighing in at 145 lbs, at 5’ 8,” this absolute snack is like a muddy gold brick on a dirt road that gets passed by those who can’t see its true character. Students of SVU, especially the ladies, I am here to bring to light a man who is single, but deserves the steady love of a woman in his life. I am here to wipe away this figurative mud and unleash SVU’s best kept secret…Skyler Nelson. There are so many qualities that make Skyler not only the best person to date, but also the best guy a woman could marry.
Parker Arnold does a fantastic job of describing some of these qualities and gives four simple yet true examples:
“1: He is going into a medical field… so if you are worried about money to pay off your SVU loans or just wanna be a house wife… look no further. Skyler will be bringing home the bacon.
2: Tired of lazy and sloppy boys? Skyler is a diligent and clean MAN! He goes to bed at a reasonable time (hot!) and wakes up consistently at 6:30 (hotter!). Also, he is so clean that his side of the room looks like something you would see in Forbes magazine
3: Jacked out of his mind. He may not always appear an absolute unit on the athletic spectrum, but this man is more built than Connor McGregor and leaner that 100% Pure Argentinian Beef
4: He loves Jesus! Are you looking for a man who will always put you first? Well you’re in the WRONG place! This man puts Christ first in everything he does. You will be a close second. Temple date? Yes please”
Ladies if those four qualities doesn’t do it for you, then take into consideration what Hunter Merrill had to say: “He’s hot, he’s a spiritual weapon, he’s got an amazing personality, and, oh yeah, he’s hot”
Not only is Skyler hot, but he also is an absolute genius. Skyler is majoring in Biochemistry and has grades that will knock your socks off. Mr. Nelson plans on graduating next semester and afterwords, head into med school as soon as possible. Skyler’s genius brain and his work ethic is bound to be the best neurologist this world has seen, and is sure to cure dementia. Ladies, if you need help studying, head to the library where you will find this sexy specimen of a man gaining a wealth of knowledge, and if you are lucky enough, he might just help you.
Aside from studying, Skyler enjoys only the coolest activities like building a rope swing off the James River Footbridge and making bonfires at Panther Falls. Skyler loves the outdoors and thoroughly enjoys hiking, dirt biking, snowboarding, and boating. He is always down for a good time doing some shenanigans.
Something that makes Skyler unique is the fact that he knows Russian. Skyler served a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Ukraine. He is very grateful for the experiences he had in Ukraine and the people that he met.
Into the Romance
Ladies, if Skyler already doesn’t seem too good to be true, then this will surely do it. Skyler is a king of romance. You heard that right. He likes only the most romantic dates, such as a picturesque horse ride into the sunset, or a home made picnic overlooking a gorgeous view. Skyler is notorious for always getting the prettiest and best flowers for the girls that he dates. He is also complete marriage material. He plans to have at least 6 children when he is married.
Devin Barbee made it simple, yet clear about Skyler, “I would say that he is 200 pounds of hot amazingness that he is a Scorpio, and that he likes beach volleyball.”
Ladies, grab your phones and clear your schedules, Skyler is looking to go on at least 10 dates before the end of the semester! Email him and see what going on a date with a chivalrous man is like! Here is Skyler’s email: Skyler.Nelson@svu.edu
This article is Skyler Nelson approved.
