Guys, A Little Romance Won’t Kill… I Promise

I want to start off my saying, for guys who think being romantic is lame, shame on you. Why a lot of you are more open to romantic gestures beats me. You guys think proper packaging is how to get the girl abi? Wrong? You can wear Tom Ford head to toe and live in Ikoyi, and still lose out on a girl (like me) if you don’t know how to be romantic.

Do you guys not watch movies? Do you guys not see the stuff that makes women swoon? Or are have you just decided to be lazy and hope that awesome dick game and Christian Louboutins will be enough to keep a girl? If so, shame, shame on all of you!

Many of you may be wondering, what is this ‘romance’ that S is yapping about? Truth is it’s quite difficult to explain because it’s not just one thing. For example, buying your girl a card and signing your name at the end is a nice gesture but what transforms it into a romantic gesture is (1) having a card made for her (2) Buying a card and filling it with your own heart felt message not the random one that comes with the card. Are you following me guys?

Romance is about doing things or saying things that express your emotions…Ugh. I feel like I’m not even expressing this right. It’s about thoughtful actions that will bring a smile to a girls face. Guys, listen, romance isn’t about buying your girl a $4000 Chanel bag, I mean it’ll be a great move and all but what will make it romantic is attaching a hand written note and having it delivered to her office on a random Wednesday. She will scream and yell with excitement…..her priceless reaction MAY be followed by her jumping on you, wrapping her arms around you, kissing you, thanking you, telling you what an amazing lover you are. And what guy doesn’t like to be appreciated?

Deny it from today till tomorrow, there is no guy who has never seen a chick flick like ‘Dear John’ and other sappy Nicholas Sparks movie, you need to whip out your mental notepad and take note of the romantic gestures in these movies. They may be corny as absolute fuck but they work IF you genuinely mean it and aren’t just trying to get laid. Don’t get me wrong, all the right romantic moves should get you laid ultimately but romance should be with someone who isn’t shag and go because romance involves effort and genuine feelings.

I appreciate the internet age that we live in, I really do. I mean, it’s because of the internet that I ‘S’, am here today hoping to pass some much needed tips to the men of Nigeria. However I strongly feel like the internet has a huge role to play in the absence or/lack of importance of romance in the present day. Before the advent of internet my dear brothers, there were no instant messages, lovers had to write each other, with actual paper and pens, go to a post office, buy a stamp, write down the address the letter would be shipped off to and wait and wait and wait for their lover to reply. Yes, it sounds tedious but I find it to be sweet anticipation, not the kind of I sent him a message on BBM, I’m waiting for him to read it kind of anticipation, eff that. After about two weeks, the kind of joy that will be in a lady’s heart when her lover replies her letter, immeasurable!

Guys, there are several of you out there, I mean the good guys obviously with good intentions but you need to realize that romantic gestures earn a lot of points. For instance, the other day I slept on the couch, the lover woke up at midnight, realized I was missing from his side, came to the living room and carried me into bed; that was proper romantic and when I remember it I smile. It wouldn’t be a cherished memory if he woke me up and expected me to walk into bed.

Look, guys, I’m here to help, so S is going to give you a few pointers on romantic gestures you should try with your girl.

  • I know there’s snapchat and whatever and you can see your girl’s face whenever but ditch that. How about showing up at her doorstep and saying “I just wanted to see your face”. I guarantee that she’ll melt like cheese in lasagna/butter on warm toast/ ice in hot water.
  • If you’re grocery shopping and you see a bottle of Ribena, buy it and have it delivered to ME. Tell me, “S, I know how much you love Ribena and I thought of you”. I’ll appreciate it, to know that I’m on your mind while you’re doing mundane things like shopping is proper romantic. *Thanks in advance to anyone who will send me Ribena*
  • Not every time go and pick up a girl to go out and you call or text saying I’m outside. Shock her one day, knock on the door and walk with her to the car, even open the door for her, lift her into her seat, peck her on the cheek.
  • Public display of affection is major romance, hold her hand while you stroll into the movies, cuddle her, hold your hand out for her when she’s about to stand up; touch her lightly here and there from time to time.
  • Sexy time can just be about achieving an orgasm after it all but how about you make it romantic. Try lighting scented candles for instance; she won’t think it’s weird because the electricity situation isn’t great anyway. Put on some soft sexy time music, emphasis on ‘soft’, have rose petals on the bed, slowly undress her, take your time pleasing her, perhaps throw in a warm bath and breakfast in bed after. Not every time rip her clothes off and have a quickie.

Being romantic is really a no brainer but it requires effort, because for you to do some romantic things, some planning must go on but whatever the case, it’s all worth it at the end of the day. Romantic gestures say that you care and that’s what we ladies want really.

Hi, my name is S and I hope I’ve been able to minister to one or two guys out there on the need to consider romance in relationships.

Written by S