The Pepe Historian Reviews: Mew Pepe

“So rare that it is still said to be a mirage by many experts.”

-Pepedex, 1999

Mew Pepe, referred to by some as the Genesis Pepe, is a rare and mysterious Pepe that has been sought after for generations. It is rumored that its binary code contains the source of every other Pepe ever created.

Shortly before the turn of the millennium, an expedition was planned into the rain forests of Guyana in South America. Reports claimed to have seen the Pepe flying through the night sky. Locals experienced many strange events, called miracles by shamans. One nearby village rejoiced as fallow fields turned fertile once more. Women in another village birthed twins for a year after a Mew Pepe sighting. This was just the beginning.

In a remote hamlet, a young boy lived who suffered from seizures. The people of the community had no access to modern medicine. They believed the boy plagued by a Bacco; a demon or evil spirit. A ritual was performed. The man was a travelling witch doctor who promised to free the boy for a far-from-modest fee.

A dais was built from whatever materials the people could muster. Atop it sat a chair. It was hardly more than sticks bound together with twine, but still, it resembled a throne. For three days, women collected every red flower for miles, then tediously wove them into the piece of furniture until it appeared to be embroidered in velvet. The cursed boy was sat upon his throne and strapped in place with heavy, leather strips.

For hours into the night, the boy thrashed as incense was burned and holy oils dabbed upon his flesh. Sweat ran down his forehead into his eyes. Spittle foamed at his lips. He screamed incoherencies as his neighbors watched in fear and awe. The doctor danced about, equally incoherent in his shouts and exclamations.

What happened next shook the world. The clouds overhead illuminated in a pink haze. A falling star, the onlookers believed. Surely a sign that their god had heard their pleas. But no, it was not a star that descended. Nor the hand of God. It was Mew Pepe, tranquil and somber, dancing through the sky like a water snake in a still, black pond. Mew Pepe alighted before the boy, and then reached out and stroked his cheek with its pink, furry paw. The boy’s convulsions stopped.

Before the crowd could realize what they were witnessing, Mew Pepe was gone. As were the boy’s seizures. As was the witch doctor, himself. The event has become folklore in Guyana. The boy, now a man, leads a prominent church in his part of the country, spreading the faith. Every now and again, the witch doctor is spotted, unmistakable with his crown of golden hair. So too, does the Mew Pepe dance through the dreams of the populace. To the disappointment of its investors, the expedition returned empty-handed. The hunt for this Pepe continues.