5 Truths You Need to Swallow To Reach Your Potential
“Tough love” from a freelancer on the same crazy journey you are.
I may seem like a freelancing hermit loner, but I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to understand people.
I’ve had thieves for friends, real estate agents as trusted advisers, painters as rivals, club kids as lovers, internet trolls as brothers, corporate types as life teachers, blue collar contractors as truth-sayers, and more.
All of the people I’ve interacted with over my insane journey have taught me a series of truths about the human condition, that I’d like to share with you.
I’m sure when I’m older my opinions on will change.
Change is inevitable.
For now, here’s what I want to say to those of you who might feel a bit lost about their life, business, what they’re doing, or who they are:
#1: Fear Is Your Rival, But Inaction Is Your Eternal and Powerful Archnemesis
Would you know it, from reading my stuff or talking to me, that I have an epic level of anxiety?
Did you know that my fear of failure sometimes paralyzes me, to the point where I go “no contact” with the internet for extended periods of time?
Probably not, because I eventually just hop back on the horse again anyways like nothing happened.
That’s the only choice: do.
No one just wakes up great at what they do, fully unafraid, and confident as duck.
They just don’t.
Firefighters don’t run into burning buildings because they have no fear. They run into burning buildings, scared shitless, but do it anyways. Because it’s their job.
Use the fear you have and work with it.
Turn fear into content. Turn it into something that makes people respond to you. Make it into social media posts, podcasts, videos, etc.
Do absolutely anything with it, to push the boulder one tiny click ahead.
Use it, own it, own how scared you are, and do the scary thing anyways.
Even if it takes a while for you to be brave (same), you have to try.
#2: Your title and experience mean absolutely nothing…
If you can’t do anything with it.
Don’t let your prestige be a stand-in for ‘doing’.
If you’re working on a project, writing an article, trying to foster a business relationship, etc, and rest on the laurels of accolades…you will be usurped.
Accolades are pretty hollow when there’s no meat in the middle.
Throwing your weight behind a title, or a number of years, or some random project you did 3053053 years ago, means very little if you can’t rise to the occasion…now.
Past you isn’t present you, and present you needs to show up so future you can succeed.
It does not matter what you’ve done or what you think you’ve done.
It matters what you do.
On this front, it’s remarkable how people respond to you when you really try.
#3: No is a complete sentence.
Sometimes you need to give people ‘the business’ and it does not make you the ‘bad guy’.
When I say ‘the business’, I mean calling out bullshit. Clients will respect you for this if you’re genuine and they’re reasonable (big requirement).
Know your limits. No is a complete sentence. You do not have to take every gig that comes your way.
I still have a problem with this, but it’s a really good lesson to learn, that I keep having to teach myself.
#4: It’s better to admit you don’t get it than pretend that you do.
Vulnerability works, try it sometime.
Try being honest with yourself, your clients, and just in life in general.
You have to have a certain special skillset to allow for the humility of failure, transparently, and the vulnerability of honesty.
You are not there yet.
I say this because most people are not ‘there yet’ for the entirety of their lives.
Humans, by their very nature, are naked blind mole rats running all over the planet, making a series of distinct fuck-ups on the way to success, pretending they know exactly what they’re doing.
If you act like a human, people tend to treat you like one, too.
For example, I quit my freelancing career for 30 days, and the world did not explode.
You also need to understand that some people, no matter what you do, cannot be helped.
They cannot be satisfied.
They will not give you the transparency and honesty you’re willing to give them.
Make peace with the fact that other people can’t always meet you the way you meet them.
And that’s okay.
Let go of the idea that everyone operates like you do. They don’t.
#5: Always keep learning, no matter what.
The tech landscape changes far too quickly. Adapt or fail.
As a freelancer, you get paid for your skills, your mind, and your solutions.
This is not like a 9-to-5 job where you can talk to Karen at the water-cooler for 4 hours straight, getting paid to do basically nothing.
You must be constantly learning.
Whether that’s reading articles, taking courses, learning from those around you, testing things out on your own time, whatever.
If you cannot keep up with contemporary practices, trends, new avenues, new tips, tricks, programs, etc, you will be left behind by those that are willing to learn.
Especially in marketing. Being willing and able to learn means you can reach your potential. You can exceed others.
The algorithms change too swiftly, consumer interests shift, more people are using adblocker every single day.
You must learn what you do not know, and learn what you might need to know…in the future.
The minute you decide ‘this is good enough’ is the minute some 16 year old develops some insane app that makes your skillset nearly obsolete.
Adapt. Overcome. Or fail.
Knowing these 5 truths is different than employing them.
It takes a long time to unlearn things that block your progress.
Don’t beat yourself up if you’re struggling to rise above.
Just know that everyone trying to do something great and challenging struggles, just like you do.
Even I have to constantly remind myself that I’m a work in progress.
In a way, knowing how clueless everybody is, deep down inside, is comforting, right?
You’ve got this. Take it one step at a time. Rome wasn’t built in a day.
Be kind to yourself.
If you want to vent send me an email.
I’ll do my best to give you some guidance, unless it’s very business related.
😃 TTYS!
Kira Leigh is a snarky marketing nerd, anime writer, and artist. See her work here and send her a message if you want to work together.
Special thanks to Renato P. dos Santos for his continued support.
