Magic: The Gathering
Magical Thinking: Coldsnap
Welcome back to Magical Thinking, a look back at the cards and art of Magic the Gathering, set by set, from the beginning, through the eyes of a casual fan. Today we’re going back in time (I mean more so than usual) all the way back to the Ice Age block, with the third and final set of Ice Age: Coldsnap.
Back in July 2006, the good people at Wizards of the Coast decided that Homelands was kind of crap, and the very first Magic block deserved a better, more appropriate third set. So Homelands was kicked out, and Coldsnap was put in.
Being a part of Ice Age block we return to Dominaria after three blocks visiting other planes, on the continent of Terisiare, where the Ice Age is beginning to thaw, and people are rejoicing. Unfortunately a new faction, the cult of the Rimewind, thought that having an endless winter was actually pretty cool, and decided to try and stop the thaw, even going so far as waking up ancient Phyrexian war machines to aid them in their crusade. As you can imagine, this goes poorly for them, and for pretty much everyone involved.
So, without further ado, the cards!
In the other Ice Age sets, the snow lands had a limited effect on gameplay, being more about flavor than anything else. However in Coldsnap we are introduced to the concept of Snow mana, where you can tap that snow permanent for snow mana, which certain effects like this one requires. The Snow mechanics have made a return to Magic in a big way with the recently released Kaldheim set, so now a whole new generation can have fun with snow mana.
And cumulative upkeep is back. Yay. Actually since this is a more modern set the designers have more experience, so they actually figure out some neat things to do with cumulative upkeep, such as with Glacial Plating. It becomes more powerful the more age counters it has on it.
Oh yeah, the Kjekdorans. Remember them from Ice Age and Alliances? Yeah, no, me neither. Sorry, all the White factions tend to blur together after a while. Although certain jerks I never forget.
Now I could make a My Little Pony joke, but how about we mix it up with a Last Unicorn joke instead. Lady Amalthea is officially done with Shmendrick’s BS. Wow I probably butchered the spellings on those names huh?
It’s new mechanic time! In this case we have Recover, which lets you get a card back if you pay mana when a creature you control dies. However, if you don’t do this the card is exiled. This ability is not on the Storm Scale, only appeared in Coldsnap, and only had seven cards associated with it, so I guess it was not a big hit.
See, here’s what I’m talking about with new ways to use old mechanics. I mean this is a pretty neat twist on the Cumulative upkeep idea. While it’s pretty bad on its head, I’m sure there are combos which can make this hurt an opponent instead of heal them, and it can be used as a nice political card in EDH.
I like the flavor of this one. This guy takes apart your artifact creature and rebuilds it as something less dangerous (IE a non-creature artifact). So turn their Darksteel Colossus into an Ensnaring Bridge or something. BUILD A BRIDGE OUT OF HIM.
I think Doctor Who fought one of these guys once.
Hey, remember this card from Scourge? I sure do, and I still love it. It’s weird that it appeared in Scourge first, but this card is from a technically earlier set since it was retroactively made part of Ice Age block. Kind of a weird chicken-or-the-egg thing.
I have mentioned I love the giant creatures Blue gets, haven’t I? I mean Green is always known as the big creature color, but then we have Blue with these big boys. He’s slow, but he hits like a truck. And he’s a giant orca-snake, which is really cool.
Now that is a big bird. I like that not only does it become stronger the more snow permanents in play, but it can turn things into snow permanents with its feathers. That’s some good flavor right there.
And here we have the other new keyword Ripple. Basically when you cast the spell, you look at the next few cards in your deck and if they’re copies of this card you can play them for free. Ripple…exists. I guess. It’s also not on the Storm Scale, and never appeared outside of Coldsnap, so I guess it’s another dud.
I guess you could say that Rimewind Master’s *Puts on shades* Are as cold as ice.
YEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!
Okay sorry about that. Won’t happen again.
Now that’s a guy who hates Phantom Spaceman.
And hey Tevesh Szat! Remember him? The token bad guy from Urza’s nine titans, who was only on the team because Urza needed someone he could kill and no one would miss him? Just in case you needed a reminder Urza was a jerk.
Oh, and this was the time when Planeswalkers were worshiped like Gods (because they, in effect, were). That era will be coming to an end soon, as we will see in the coming weeks.
You know, if you got enough mana and life, and two of these guys, you can pretty much clear out your opponent’s board for a big final swing. Just make sure not to go overboard.
Hey, Leshrac. There’s another Planeswalker of note.
Also this may be the best Cumulative upkeep card ever, because it lets you steal your opponent’s land, and gives your herald more power when they do so, plus it kind of gives your opponent incentive not to play any more land since they’re gonna lose it anyway. Like no joke, I unironically love this card.
Oh boy, that old Phyrexian stuff. I’m glad we don’t have to deal with that in the modern era or anything. I mean it’s not like Karn dragged some Phyrexian oil and left it on Mirrodin when he left and it’s eventually gonna remake Phyrexia on that plane OH WAIT!
If you don’t warn your kids about the dangers of blue raspberry, who will?
Honestly, zombie sled dogs and driver is such a good concept I may use it in DnD at some point. I do own Rime of the Frostmaiden after all. I could see these as a random encounter in that adventure.
Keep in mind this was released adjacent to Ravnica block, so I imagine Earthen Goo is what the Gruul clans call the result of them eating some expired food they find in a dumpster somewhere.
Goblin snowboarder. I really don’t have to say anything else do I? Goblin. Snowboarder. I can’t top that. I mean, I’m good but I’m not that good. This may be the most awesome Goblin in all of Magic. Yes, even better than Slobad. I’ll say it!
Hey, it’s Ludo from Labyrinth. Jokes aside, that’s a really cool looking Minotaur. Very old school aesthetic. Almost looks like he’s from an old horror movie.
Also, once again a great and creative use of Cumulative upkeep. The designers really knocked it out of the park with this one.
Here’s a card with a fun little bit of chaotic flavor to it. Basically if you have land in hand, you can keep pumping this storm and choosing new targets, but so can your opponent. Actually looking at it, this card seems really confusing.
I ATTACK WITH THE BLUE EYES WHITE —
Wait, no no, abort. I keep forgetting that’s a different game (Which, again, no one wants to hear me talk about NOT THAT I’M BITTER OR ANYTHING *Pouts*).
Pretty sure this is meant to be the Magic equivalent of the Remorhaz, a classic DnD monster. It’s still pretty cool all things considered. Plus, giant slugs are always an awesome type of monster.
Yes, now I can create that epic Auroch tribal deck of my dreams. What with Magic’s grand total of four Aurochs in the entire game. Truly a force to be reckoned with.
The giant lizard is cool, but I’m wondering what those weird owl dog things it’s protecting are. Once again a cool creature which may or may not get its own card.
Yep, because it’s not Green until we mess with the flyers. I mean flying in snowy conditions is already a risky proposition, but add ice spiders to the mix and it’s Goodnight, Irene.
Also, pretty sure there was a SyFy made for TV movie based on these things I saw once.
Oh yeah, the Martyrs. Guess I should talk about them, huh. They’re a cycle of shamans who you sacrifice and reveal cards from your hand and they do a thing. They aren’t very exciting or flavorful, so I don’t really care for them. Moving on.
Hey, remember the Wiitigo from Ice Age? That off-brand version of the Wendigo that needs to keep fighting or it starves to death? Now you can transform any creature into one (quite gruesomely if the art is any indication). Which is a pretty interesting card.
That ape’s gone totally bananas. There, prerequisite monkey joke out of the way. Moving on.
We get a couple of multicolored cards in this set, keeping with Ice Age’s theme of allied colors. We got a whole cycle of shard cards. Like this little gal, who is taking a break from that one bit in Fantasia to go out and kick some butt.
Hey, it’s the lady who commissioned those assassins with recover I like so much. She doesn’t really do much in he story though. I know we kicked Homelands out of the block, but couldn’t we have found a way to keep Baron Sengir somehow?
We have a new type of mana, so naturally we need a new type of mana rock.
He’s Mr. Plow, that’s his name. That name again is Mr. Plow. Now we just need a heavy metal remix. I WARNED YOU ABOUT THEM PHYREXIANS. I TOLD YOU, BRO!
Oh, but there’s someone else we’re forgetting, isn’t there? Yep, it’s her, Marit Lage. Magic’s original eldritch horror. Before the Eldrazi, before the Nephilim, before…actually around the same time as Yawgmoth, we had Marit Lage, sleeping in the ice, whispering out to those who would hear her. Only hinted at before in Ice Age, now she’s got her own card, and she’s coming out with a vengeance. Sadly I don’t think she has any storyline significance, but she’s there nevertheless.
And that concludes our look at Coldsnap. Next week we begin what I consider the most important set in all of Magic. This is the set that changed EVERYTHING. Quite literally in some cases. We’re going back to the past in a very real sense, because next time we start up Time Spiral block. So until the next yesterday, stay Magical my friends.
