Magic: The Gathering
Magical Thinking: Planar Chaos
Welcome back to Magical Thinking, a look back at the cards and art of Magic: the Gathering, set by set, through the eyes of a casual fan. This week we are looking at the second set of Time Spiral block: February 2007’s Planar Chaos.
Things are still pretty bad in Dominaria right now. Not only is the past merging with the present, but rifts are opening up to a thousand different parallel realities. Terferi, along with his allies Jhoria and Venser, is trying to fix the damage, but it seems like things are going from bad to worse. Is Dominaria doomed?
We’ll worry about that later. For now, CARDS!
Hey Crovax! Long time, no see. Hmm, something seems different about you. Did you get a haircut?
This is the big gimmick of this set; not only is past and present merging (Which can justify having Crovax here at all when he died centuries ago) but we’re getting alternate versions of classic Magic characters and Cards. I wonder what other wacky characters we’ll run into in this set.
Heroes Remembered, when you want to put your opponent’s burn deck on a very tight clock to actually kill you. Hope you got that Embercleave in your opening hand smart guy.
Oh joy. Now White decks get to enjoy the fun of keeping track of spore counters. Although, I suppose this works better in a Selesnya deck since you have more fungi to work with then.
This is how it feels when I play Arena recently. It’s why I’m taking a break from actually playing Magic at the moment. The salt is real (Salt being a slang term for being frustrated and losing and complaining about it in a game).
I’m sorry Serra died off relatively early in the story line, because if she had stuck around she’d probably be ashamed of the stuff her worshipers got up to. It seems like 90% of her followers have been complete creeps when they show up .
And here we have one of the timeshifted cards of this set, which are reprints of older cards, but they’re from a parallel reality and are thus a different color. Here we have a white version of our old pal Blastodem from Nemesis. That White/Green deck is looking better all the time.
Hey, who wants to give White counter spells? Sure, we all do. As I recall one of the major complaints about this set was that the planeshifted cards broke the color wheel. Which…I mean they aren’t wrong. But it was still a fun little experiment.
Oh, so when White brings the dead back they’re revered, but when Black wants to animate some Drudge Skeletons it’s an abomination. I feel like there’s a double standard going on here.
And here we have another AU version of a famous Magic character, this time it’s our old pal Braids from the Cabal. Looking somewhat less insane than in her normal continuity. Also, this whole thing better end with Volrath and Gerrard working in a coffee shop together or I’m gonna be mad.
I mentioned this last time, but part of the fun of bringing back these old mechanics is seeing how a design team with more experience can use them in inventive ways. Vanishing was an ability designed to restrict stronger creatures by giving them a time limit. But here, when the time runs out, the giant illusion amoeba splits into multiple versions. I’m not sure if the tokens it creates also split when they vanish (Since Tokens don’t go to the graveyard per se), but it’s still a neat card.
Something something Ape Law.
I like this card because it paves the way for later Blue “change creatures into something else” spells such as Frogify from Throne of Eldraine (although that card is an enchantment).
Here’s another good use for vanishing: Make a card that gives other things Vanishing. Best part is once it’s on a card there’s no way to get rid of it because once the enchantment is gone so is the permanent.
And of course we have the natural conclusion of all these suspend and vanish cards: A wizard who can manipulate them, either adding them or taking them off. And he’s a morph, so you can deploy him on the field and wait for the right moment to strike.
Oh, I’ll get over you, I know I will. I’ll pretend my ship’s not sinking. And I’ll tell myself, I’m over you, because I’m the king of Wistful Thinking.
…Anyone get that reference? Anyone? God, I’m old.
One thing I love about Terferi, he’s not sheepish about some good word play.
And here we have “what if Serra was a Blue magic user instead of White”. Also I think this was the era that really started casting Sphinxes as an iconic Blue monster (There was Ravnica, but I think this continued the trend).
I know it looks bad, but they’re really just giving him a hug. He’s had a rough day.
Also, I love when Black does these sadistic choice style card. You can either sacrifice a creature, or you can deal with my 4/2 zombie horde. The choice is yours.
Hey, another good use of Vanishing, and it’s the baby form of everyone’s favorite killer bug, Deadly Insect from Alliances. It’s a double threat!
Considering all the crap that happened to Mirri in the actual story, this is a lateral move at best.
You know, spitting is a terrible, disgusting habit. I don’t care if it gives them first strike, I cannot sign off on this. Where’s the good manners Sliver when you need it?
I guess this is Black’s take on Red’s treachery style cards. And it’s also a take on making sure I never sleep again. This is the most horrifying card art I’ve seen since The Dark.
And here we have one of the most popular and well-known cards of the set. Black’s version of Wrath of God. Because who doesn’t love just wiping out everything on the board at once? I know I do.
Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Volrath. I mean, who are you trying to fool? Also, this is a color shift of Recycle, but without the charming Phil Foglio art that made that card a winner. *Sigh* I miss the Foglio’s Magic art.
Again, I feel like this is a lateral move from the original card. Akroma’s card was already super angry. But now she’s super SUPER angry, you guys. I mean it. Also, kudos for the design team giving her morph, which she should have had in the original version too because she is one of Ixidor’s creations.
I guess I should talk about some of the cycles of the set. Like Charms! They’re cheap spells that give you a variety of options for different things, including an ability that color doesn’t usually have (In this case giving trample). They’re okay I guess, just not very interesting.
Um, we’re sure these guys are human? With the red eyes and the pale skin and the fangs? Are we sure Baron Sengir didn’t escape Homelands when they ejected it from Ice Age block?
Alright, I looked it up and these guys are Keldon humans, who you may recall are huge beefcakes and have ashy gray skin. So yeah, not vampires. Probably. Still keeping my eye on them.
Shivan Meteor: When you need something absolutely dead in about two turns. Lord of the Pit’s gonna be Lord of the crater when this baby makes landfall.
Oh yeah, and Red gets a bunch of these double cards for some reason. I think the theme here is one half is a weak version of the spell, and the other half is the strong version of the spell. I feel like the Kicker Mechanic does this better and easier than the double cards. But then we wouldn’t have double cards, would we?
And here we have the Red version of the iconic Green spell Giant Growth. Which in Red equates to…hitting things really REALLY hard. Yeah, that scans.
See, in this case the card isn’t a color shift, but a color correction. Prodigal Sorcerer (the card this is based on) never made sense as a blue card, since it always had an effect that made more sense in Red. Well, now we have the Red version. I feel like they had a big whiteboard that was like “There are cards that NEED to be color shifted”.
Hey, it’s been a while since we had ourselves a good Wumpus hunt. Also, I have to disagree with the flavor text since it seems pretty damned easy to divert the Wumpus. Or is sacrificing the land moving the village? This metaphor is confusing.
Now here’s a neat creature. It’s bigger based on the number of counters your creatures have, and gives creatures counters while suspended. So you can make sure it always has something out there before it comes out.
I feel like Green got the short straw here. I mean, every other color gets an iconic character from Magic’s past: Akroma, Crovax, and Green gets….Jedit, the Vanilla Azorius legendary from Legends. Again, I feel like the whiteboard was in play here, with a decree of “bring back a legendary from Legends and make it not-terrible”. Me? I would have gone with Boris Devilboon.
Hey, and another cycle of Magi who this time have the power of famous lands. Like this guy who has the powers of the Library of Alexandria. Also, the art was done by Pathfinder lead artist Wayne Reynolds. Always love to see that guy’s art.
Oh now we’re talking. On Sarpadia, people lick Thallids to have hallucinations. Mortality rate is quite high. I would not recommend it. Or at the very least ask permission first, but that’s common courtesy.
And hey, since this set is all about messing with the color wheel in fun ways, rather than getting some flying hate, this time around Green gets…flyers! Uktabi Drake in the sky, I can fly twice as high…
And here we have the Green version of Ball Lightning. Which is…an angry tumbleweed I think. Look, not all the conversions are gonna be gold, okay?
Okay, they are definitely pushing for Selesnya in this set. It’s not just me, right? We all see it.
Hey, I found a worse Sliver than Plague Sliver. Although that flavor text makes it sound like the Slivers are doing something other than sleeping….
Finally, we have a cycle of three color dragons. These ones based on the dragons from Invasion, only this time using Tarkir wedge colors. Here we have Numot, the Jeskai dragon. AKA Captain America’s favorite deck color (Because its Red, White and Blue. Get it? Yes I am a comedic genius, feel free to worship me at your leisure. WORSHIP ME!).
So I guess it’s not just the humans who rock the gray skin in Keld, it’s everyone. Maybe they don’t get enough sun up there? Or too much sun? Either way it’s not the correct amount of sunlight.
Okay, I think I figured out why Dominaria is so messed up. Seriously, you had like five or six godlike wizards around at the time and no one said “Hey maybe we should chuck Yawgmoth’s corpse into the sun or something”? Really, just leave it there in Urborg, it’ll be fine. Seriously, people on Dominaria are idiots.
Well, that does it for this week’s Magical Thinking. Tune in next time when we look at the final Time Spiral set, Future Sight, which is the set that will CHANGE EVERYTHING. Until then though, stay Magical.
