React or Respond? The Institutional No/Yes?

“Kids are never the problem. They are born scientists. The problem is always the adults. They beat the curiosity out of kids.” — Neil deGrasse Tyson

I enjoy supporting my 6-year-old son as he learns to play football. I position myself in his line of vision so he knows I am there and every so often give him a thumbs up when he glances my way. My idea of support is to be present and to offer positive reinforcement, when I see him do something good, I remember it and make sure he remembers it too by reminding him on our way home and that night before bedtime. It always breaks my heart when a parent pressures their child when they are in this fragile state of development. These kids are 6 years old and they are not only learning a new sport, but they are learning team dynamics.

Last weekend, one kid faced an empty goal; his whole team held their breath as he took his best shot. He missed badly, swinging at the ball wildly. I looked at an animated parent on the sideline, obviously the child’s father. The child glanced to his dad for a reaction and his dad shook his head in disappointment. I watched the kid as he chased the ball trying to make amends to his father for his “mistake”. I could feel his little heart hurting as he did so, full of self doubt and shame. Sounds awful! We would never do that! What a terrible parent! Before we judge we should…