Gaming | Horror | Art

Eat the Reich: Nazis are Bad

This TTRPG is mechanically elegant, visually glorious, and thematically apropos

Credit: Rowan, Rook, and Decard

“I’ve known good vampires. People who never asked for this curse, who don’t inflict their pain and hunger on others.

But I’ve never known a good nazi.”

— Captain America, Avengers #14 — Blood Hunt, Part One

“They make jokes where “kill the f*ggot” is the punchline, and their response to being called out is to double the fuck down and act like it’s good and normal to push hate and death threats onto innocent people.

Queer folk: stay dangerous, keep each other safe.

This gets worse.”

— Queer Armorer

Eat the Reich is a tabletop roleplaying game about exsanguinating nazis. It’s World War II and you’re a bunch of vampires dropped into nazi-occupied Paris on a mission to kill Hitler. Players apply boatloads of occult power and ultraviolence at, onto, into, and through every fascist that gets in your way.

The mission is fairly straightforward — drink all of Hitler’s blood. The game is a frantic dash through Paris to get to Hitler’s zeppelin while leaving a bloody smear of fascist swine the whole way.

On the surface, Eat the Reich looks and sounds like one of those satanic games they warned you about in the 80s, but it’s all OK because you’re the good guys and the bad guys are literal nazis.

The rules are lightweight, flexible, and prioritize lighthearted death and destruction. You play one of six pre-built vampires (although you can tinker with them a bit), who are very good at shooting, stabbing, biting, and blowing up fascist scum.

The book features a map of the city and details on all the narratively important locations, including the bad guys that are trying to stop you at every turn…