Magic: The Gathering
Magical Thinking: Avacyn Restored
Welcome back to Magical Thinking, a look back at the cards and art of Magic: the Gathering, set by set, from the beginning. All through the eyes of a casual fan. This week we finish our look at the Innistrad block with its third set: May 2012’s Avacyn Restored.
Avacyn, the angelic protector of Innistrad, has returned. Now she’s gonna beat back all those perpetrators and instigators, and top on her list is the demon Gristlebrand and his crew. It’s a knock-down drag-out fight for the soul of Innistrad! Who will win? Who will die? And what cool cards will we get out of it? Let’s find out.
This sets the tone for the entire set right here. Now that Avacyn is back, the good guys have a fighting chance against the zombies, vampires and werewolves. Also, I love the flavor here; she’s not just destroying the zombies, she’s bringing them back to life. That’s pretty cool.
And here she is, the Big Good, the protector of the realm, the lady whose name is on the expansion. It’s nice to see an angel whose not a complete monster like some others we’ve seen (Like Radiant and Akroma). She definitely lives up to the hype of being Innistrad’s savior.
A major theme of this set are flicker effects, which allow you to temporarily remove a creature and put it back into play. This can have a variety of effects, and is one of my favorite mechanics.
Ouch. Yeah, welcome to the Avacyn dental plan I guess. Well, I said she was good. I never said she was nice.
Miracle is a new mechanic for this set. It’s basically the destiny draw from Yugioh. If you draw the card and play it on the same turn it has reduced mana cost, which means you can use it for some last ditch mega plays. Miracle is a 9 on the Storm Scale, mainly because it apparently slowed down tournaments, so don’t expect to see to much of it in standard.
Nothing to say on this one except she’s got a really cool outfit. I want to use this art to make a DnD character now.
Castlevania theme intensifies.
Oh yeah, spirits. Those are still a thing for White in this block. Although with Avacyn back they are kind of taking a back seat in the action.
Man, killed while he was feeding his pet bats. Now that’s a cheap shot.
And here we have another new mechanic: Soulbound, which does something as long as your creature has a partner. Not sure where it is on the storm scale, but it only appears in this set so that says enough.
So, despite the fact that Avacyn is back, the mad scientists of Blue are still on their bullshit.
Man, Oz is gonna get jacked up after all those zombies land in it.
Aw, how cute. These are gryffs, which are basically Pegasus with bird heads, and they are pretty and I love them.
Geist snatch sounds like the name of a wacky hidden camera prank show. “YOU’VE BEEN GEIST SNATCHED! WHAAAAAT?” Okay that was terrible, never doing that again.
Now that is a big zombie right there. Where did they get the parts for that thing?
When you love one creature enough you want to make your entire deck that creature.
Pretty sure this was Joe Biden’s Inauguration speech.
Pretty sure the dead shouldn’t be thinking at all. I mean they’re dead, kind of the missing point really.
Okay, this is not the Miyazaki movie I was expecting. I think I like the one with the little girl and the dragon better.
Hey, new planeswalker! This is Tamiyo, she’s a moonfolk from Kamigawa and travels around as a kind of passive neutral observer of things. She will be kind of important later. But for now her main significance is showing us that Kamigawa is still a thing.
This is the zombie apocalypse domain. It’s about time we got down to some good old fashioned brain eating.
Worth noting my favorite Castlevania game is Portraits of Ruin, which is about a vampire painter who turns Dracula’s castle into the castle from Mario 64, with paintings you can enter. So this right here is my jam.
Man, just two letters away from a hit show on HBO. Also, this zombie looks like they were designed by Rob Liefeld.
It stands to reason, “we have angels, so we might as well get some demons in here as well”. And like all demons they got to make it all about themselves, demanding a sacrifice when they show up.
See, this is what I miss from old Magic; the downright WEIRD card art. Magic needs more weird creepy stuff like this in its art.
Honestly, he seems more bored than horrified at his continuing zombification.
Here we have the Big Bad. Griselbrand. This guy is so busted he’s banned in Commander. And that format is pretty much the wild west — anything goes. That’s how scary this guy is.
See, don’t buy a zombie unless you plan on taking care of them. Owning a zombie is a big responsibility and they can’t function in the wild on their own.
Don’t worry, just throw some Hydrogen Peroxide on that it’ll be fine in the morning. Now if you excuse me I need to put up job postings I MEAN BAKE A CAKE.
Wouldn’t a renegade demon be a good guy?
Sometimes the flavor text just makes a card. This is one of those times.
Vampires have weird priorities.
Man, we haven’t had a burning at the stake since The Dark (And that was…not fun). I do like the flavor here that the bigger the mob you have the bigger the fire you make. You cast this with seven creatures to tap and you can one hit kill an opponent.
Your lesson for today: Devils explode when you kill them.
We’ve seen a lot of vampires in this block, but this is the most Count Dracula looking vampire yet. He looks like he walked off the set of a Hammer film. I love it.
I like how the guy in the middle looks like a drunken sea captain and the guy on the right is his doctor coming to give him a check up (well the guy looks like a doctor, doesn’t he?)
Not really sure how this fits into the whole gothic horror aesthetic of the plane, but it is a pretty big and creepy monster I’ll give them that.
Um, Avacyn is a good guy right? I wasn’t mistaken there, was I?
Okay, I looked it up. The spell actually fixed all willing werewolves by turning them into wolves with inner peace. And it was entirely consensual no one was forced to change. So yeah, Avacyn is still above board.
That looks a bit worse than annoying, but I guess we are grading on a curve, so whatever.
Oh no, not Margaret Thatcher! Hasn’t Innistrad suffered enough?
Oh Tibalt. Tibalt Tibalt Tibalt. Most newer Magic players mainly know Tibalt as the guy who impersonated the MTG version of Loki. But this was his very first card, and it was terrible. In fact it was, and probably is, the worst planeswalker card ever made. To the point that Tibalt remained a joke for years until War of the Spark gave him a decent card. But more on that later.
Castlevania music intensifies further.
Trigger warning ahead for people with Arachnophobia. I know Green usually has a lot of spiders, but this time is worse than most.
That is a very big frog. Is it a frog? Looks like a frog. Kind of.
Now here is a great creature to help you get your bearings.
Yes, I know that was horrible. And I don’t care.
Can we just appreciate there is a card called “Eaten by Spiders” in this set? And it does exactly what it says it does.
I hope the Three Little Pigs know a good exorcist.
The Dune jokes write themselves, don’t they?
…Okay, no Belmont has ever done that. But now I kind of wish one would…
I don’t blame him. I may have to put a trigger warning for Arachnophobia on this one.
Garruk and Lilliana are having a differing of opinions. One that will probably end with one of them lacking a few vital organs.
We’re gonna need a lot of Roundup weed killer.
And here’s what Avacyn turned some of the werewolves into. Reminder that this was entirely consensual and these guys are way better off than they were as werewolves. So good for them.
Of course it’s not just Avacyn whose back, but also her siblings, who represent combinations of white and other colors (except Black, IIRC her and Avacyn did not see eye to eye on things and Avacyn kind of killed her). In any case this is a good spell because it stops your opponent from making you sacrifice things. Keep all your little buddies safe, don’t let go of a single one.
Man, they really tricked out that wardrobe to Narnia, didn’t they?
I feel like there’s a Cloud Atlas joke in here somewhere. Um, something something true true yeah I got nothing.
The recipe for the McRib.
Next time on MTV’s Cribs: Avacyn’s Palace.
And on that note we say our fond farewell to Innistrad. We’ll be back one day though. In the meantime we’re making a return trip to a fan favorite. Next time we return to Ravnica with the next block and expansion…Return to Ravnica. So polish up your guild signet and make sure your dues are paid (especially if you are Orzhov) and don’t forget above all else to Stay Magical.
