Feeling sad because of the past? Here’s how you can get over it.

If you’re even remotely like me, you’ve regularly been troubled by your stupid brain — and that too, at the worst moments. Perhaps at 1 am, when you’re planning to sleep peacefully, it wants to remind you of the embarrassing incident from college days or how your ex always made you feel insecure.

It is not just bothersome while sleeping. Meeting a new date, trying a new dish, saying yes to the challenging project at work or signing up for the hobby class. Our fears from our past repeatedly stop us from moving forward and being happy.

Yes, there is no shortage of motivational speakers or life coaches asking you to let the past be in the past, let it go, or forget about it. They might as well have you eat pizza while dancing around a banana tree. It sounds interesting but doesn’t give us any results by itself. But, what can we then do to relieve ourselves from the burdens and traumas from the past?

Moreover, being impacted by the past is completely illogical, too. How can something come to haunt you if it’s already gone? Then, why does the human brain, despite being at the top of the natural world, still not understand this simple logic?

Actually, it does. The brain never concerns itself with the past. It is perfectly wired to not let the past affect how we feel or what we do. It is built for our survival — and thinking about the past is not the best way to survive. Instead, it focuses on the more critical aspect of survival: the future.

The past doesn’t influence you, the future does. We’re more concerned if that relationship, new dish or challenging project is going to keep us happy in the future or not. Our past, and other peoples’ past experiences we’ve heard about, simply influence how we perceive the future to turn out.

Therefore, the next time you feel bothered about your past, ask yourself: is there 100% guarantee that the past is going to repeat itself? Furthermore, if there’s only a 25% guarantee, then why not decrease my fears and anxiety by 75%? Trust me, you’ll feel a sense of greater control because the future is unpredictable. Ironic, but true.

Keep living, keep growing, keep smiling.

Originally published at https://thewiseidiot.in on April 16, 2020.