I don’t like mangoes. Can I please live in peace?
An entire year has gone by, and we are back to the loathsome time. It consists of everything I dislike — the season, months, temperature; mainly because more than half of the time I am being a couch potato and contemplating, ‘what can I do with my life?’ But, most importantly, the thing that more than 100% of the population gets excited about — MANGOES!
But, I happen to be a citizen of India who enjoys the Fundamental Right of Speech and Choice. So, if you have something to say to me, go ahead. You’d probably enjoy the right too; though it’s not necessary to say it out loud a 100 times. But, then again, freedom of choice.
There may be people who would come back from the dead for mangoes, but I definitely don’t enjoy anything about them.
Let me tell you why.
The Hype
Let’s face it, they are a little too hyped up for the results they give. They seem to me like any other normal fruit. Normal fruit?! Are you nuts? Yes, and no, because fruits=sweet+delicious+divine. Umm, let’s think about it… that’s probably all fruits!
Too Yellow
The color of the mango is too yellow for my liking. Think about it, its mixture of green, lemon yellow, and mustard yellow. Not even a good color combination. Basically, it’s just too yellow.
Too squishy
Ripe mangoes happen to be too squishy, and I DON’T LIKE SQUISHY! Mangoes never happen to have the right amount of firmness or softness. It’s just the right amount of weird.
Too many kinds
Which fruit in the entire of the universe has so many kinds? Let’s name them all. Alphonso, Dasheri, Kesar, Neelam, Jaya, Sushma… and the list keeps going.
First of all, why are there so many kinds, and what are these names?! Second, what in the world makes these any different than each other? They are all mangoes!
Let’s not get to the juices
Heaven knows how many juices are made and magically preserved throughout the year. Guys, its time to realize that mango juice literally means that you’re having mangoes 365 days of a year. In addition, the ads don’t really help. They make me cry out loud!
Why not muskmelon?
This is a serious question and needs to be given some consideration. Muskmelon is a fruit, too. It is sweet, cooling and quite frankly doesn’t give as many heat boils all over your body. So, why do mangoes steal all the thunder?
Basically, mangoes are not something I enjoy.
And I would like to take this opportunity and tell everyone to stop asking the people who don’t like mangoes, ‘ YOU DON’T LIKE MANGOES?!’.
Get Notified
Originally published at https://thewiseidiot.in on March 30, 2019.
