Minnesota crime leads the criminal befuddlement list this week. Police calmly patrolling the regional park at 1 am narrowly missed being smashed by a speeding SUV. 
 Since moments before the SUV also blew through a stop sign, police gave chase. The SUV occupants attempted to outrun law enforcement unaware suspects only manage to elude police 18% of the time. 
 The pursuit ended suddenly when the SUV driver lost control and crashed into a parked car. Four suspects exited the vehicle but didn’t make it far. 
 A search of the vehicle revealed Gordy the goat, lying in the cargo area, not injured, only dazed by his wild ride. The pursuit spurred by reckless driving turns into a thwarted kidnapping. 
 Apparently, the suspects hankered for a goat to roast and knew just where to find one. The hard-working billies munching on the park brambles and tall grass. 
 A goat supper interrupted by incompetent driving and failure to pay attention to who you’re sideswiping. Officers posed with the intended victim for a memorable ending to an attempted goat-napping.