The Sith: The First Endangered Species

On May 25, 1983, the world witnessed the murder of an innocent Sith legend, Darth Sidious. You were all there. We held our breath, as the “professed” Sith, Anakin Skywalker (Darth Vader) — often referred to as the one who brought balance to the force — proceeded to lift an elderly, sickly man over his head and toss him down a hole.

What kind of monster throws a senior citizen down a hole? Darth Sidious, having just recently celebrated his 86th birthday, likely died of emotional trauma (caused by the betrayal of his longtime BFF, Vader) just before reaching the bottom of the pit and instant death. Lord Vader himself died later that day.

With the arrival of Kylo Ren and his master, Leader Snoke, we have to ask ourselves, ‘How long until these Sith are violently killed and their names forgotten or despised?’ Since we became aware of their existence, people have been hunting the Sith and removing their appendages from their bodies. My purpose is to raise awareness for the plights of the Sith culture.

Though the public was not informed of it until 1999, a Jedi known as Obi-Wan Kenobi violently separated the legs from Darth Maul, an innocent bystander of the Separatist invasion. In Darth Maul’s own words, written in his personal journal just before his violent death:

“Today, I won a Teddy Bear at the fair. It made me sad that Darth Sidious didn’t congratulate me. Sometimes, I just feel so misunderstood. I do admit that I have anger problems. If people would only stop to ask me about my life, I wouldn’t feel the need to pull out my double-sided lightsaber and defend myself.”

Though there are rumors that Darth Maul survived the incident, we are grateful for this excerpt from his journal. Of course, this excerpt has been kept under lock and key, seeing as its existence would be damning to the rebel cause. Nobody wants to know that the Sith have feelings. I hold this as proof that we have turned off our humanity toward this noble people.

We, among Sith-advocates, are hopeful. We hope to see a spread of understanding with the advent of the First Order, a Sith-activist group previously operating out of Starkiller Base (an unfortunately named, peace-loving space station).

In closing, I have only a few questions for those of you seeking to destroy the few remaining Sith left in the galaxy: Do we not all have flaws? Are we not all Sith? Have we not all shot lightning out of our hands at some point in our lives? Do you not believe that there should be a balance to the force? Would not the extermination of the Sith throw off that balance? Think about these questions. The answers hold hope for an entire civilization.