A Fling On Flings
I must be cold, relationships are not inherently romantic. But warmly flings are always romantic. If the romance in a fling fizzles then that fling has become a relationship. There has been a bold misunderstanding in society, relationships are not romantic, they are simply agreements. The romance of a relationship is imbued into it. It is the fling that is romantic, all romantic gestures in relationships are done to recapture the fling, but none can.
Are you writing relationships cannot have love? I did now and what has love got to do with it? Neither flings nor relationships necessitate love of any sort, not in our way too dense English sense, not under any of the Greek definitions, or any other selected definition. Inherently flings and relationships are loveless, love is imbued into them.
Returning to romance, romance does not require love, in fact it is the most heartless that are the most romantic. For romance is a gesture, and gesters are for actors. In acting you play a role, you must remove your own heart to fit a mould. Thus, the most romantic are those who can cast themselves well into the role of the romantic.
Romance is also quite the game, like seduction it has its own rules. If one is in a fling one assuringly has gotten past the point of seduction, they must come to realize they are playing a new game or look foolish. Those who still bring dice to a card game never get to romance and therefore cannot have flings. Constant seduction is not a fling, constant physicality is not a fling. No that is just fucking or a sexual partner. No those in flings go on dates, hold hands, and open doors, they follow the romantic gestures taught by their specific society. It does not matter why or how these romantic gestures came to be, they are, therefore following them makes them romantic. Romance is a rhythm, of course one can add their own flair, this personally recommended.
Constant, regular, romantic passion fades away fully after a time. It takes time for people to realize that rose colored lenses look fucking stupid. When one starts seeing their partner for what they actually are they may come to like them even more. However, more often than not, it was the rose colored lenses that kept you at the stint.
A first fight is the benchmark that either ends a fling or starts a relationship. There is nothing romantic about fighting, fights are far too tragic for such fluffy things as flings. Anyone who thinks fights are romantic has deluded themselves into harm. Fights are unneeded in any state of affairs, but they happen, and in a fling they are a point of no return.
Interactions with others just get more and more complicated over time. Rose colored lenses don’t work well in stabbing sunlight. A fling is always inadequate, limited in amount, but this is partly what makes flings good. Are not the best pieces of media those you wish were just a little bit longer, those you wish you had a little more of. The same goes with a fling, if you want a little more you had the right amount. The ideal fling ends at the right time, amicably, but our society has ruined this by setting its sights on relationships. We can not accept romance had and romance lost, no we must keep the other in our dungeons rather than only show our gardens. If only we were more accepting of flings, rose colored lenses are nice to wear. Too early we try to sign contracts with the rose colored lenses on and as a result misread the print. There is a time and place for contracts for those who want them. But we do not let flings be flings ruining them with bureaucracy.
Soulless, mechanical, and counting are the seducers. This is the realm of bravado where score is kept and the goal is to run up numbers. What joy is there in reducing people to object numbers. So many sectors of society tell us to maximize our quantity of those we bed. Is there not something nice about hand holding, can dates not be fun events? Sex is just one of many enjoyable activities you can engage with another with. In contrast to the seducers, there are of course those who like to settle in their nook of the world. That is who relationships are for. Flings allow for action and rest, these things are not offered by the seducer and the relationship. The seducer must constantly score, while the relationship must always be beholden to their contract. Does rest not allow one to be more vital, more there, rest does a great deal of good, it is hard for the sleepy and tired to invest. So lastly, if you want seduction show dice, if you want romance show cards, if you want a relationship show a contract.
Writer Anthony David Vernon
Anthony David Vernon is a Cuban-American literary writer and a master’s level philosophy student at the University of New Mexico. He has been published in a variety of literary journals including The Cabinet of Heed and The Mindful Word.
