Men No Longer Have to Be Afraid of Forming Strong Emotional Bonds With Their Children
A casual comment from my grandmother illustrated how much gender roles have evolved
My grandmother, who has since passed away, met my daughter only once. My father has never met my children, and he likely never will.
The meeting happened in 2010. This was shortly after I’d returned from what might be called my “self-imposed exile” to Peru. Actually, I never saw my time abroad as an exile. Instead, it was a period of joyous self-exploration. In Peru, I learned how to discard my baseless burden of shame.
My uncle politely inquired whether he could bring my grandmother to meet my daughter, and I agreed. He brought her to the house my wife and I had purchased the year before. We lived on the second floor, and the renter on the first floor took care of three fourths of the mortgage.
I noticed my grandmother giving me an odd look as I stood bouncing with my daughter to make her giggle. Recognizing I’d caught her eye, she said, “My father would have never held a baby.”
I smiled and replied, “Then your father missed out on the best parts of life.”
