While I’m Passing Shizuoka

A Writer’s Thoughts and Feelings on a Journey through Honshu, Part 1

While I’m passing Shizuoka, I can see a familiar smile out of the corner of my eye. I turn my head and look at her. She must have had her hair cut short. Understandable, isn’t it? Some things can’t stay the same.

久しぶりですねえ。

A long time indeed. I am counting the years on my fingers, but their exact number escapes me. Still, you haven’t aged a day. Although you must be a woman now, you still have the features of a young girl. My eyes stay with your lower lip that has always looked larger than its upper sibling.

I never thought I would come to this place beyond the seaside at Atami and the views of Mt. Fuji. But now I’m here and so are you. I’m picturing the last time we met in a palace garden far, far away. The summer leaves were whispering then; I can hear them again now, here at the train station in March.

“I was planning on spending the afternoon with you.”

Back then this meant so much. And now?

I’m feeling hungry, so I walk along the platform and into the station to find a place where I can buy a sandwich. There is a golden girl sitting near the exit, but I have no eyes for her. I can feel you following me from a distance. Why aren’t you coming closer? Have too many years passed? You don’t live here anymore. Has this place become strange and foreign to you as well?

I buy a sandwich and eat it while waiting for my train to Hamamatsu. When I board, I can feel a new urgency in your eyes that are still staring at me from behind, so I turn around. When our eyes meet, my smile comes as a relief. For a few seconds we are just looking at each other.

Then you say: “I’m sorry.”

I say: “It’s been so many years. Don’t worry about it.”

“I didn’t mean to…”

The rest is cut off by the closing doors. You are still standing there while the train is fitfully gaining momentum. From here on you can’t follow me anymore. This is our goodbye.

It is with a visit from you, so it seems, that my journey begins.

(The ritualistic Japanese expression「久しぶりですねえ。」translates into “It has been a long time, hasn’t it?” and is commonly used as a conversation opener when talking to a familiar person after a longer period of time without any contact. The stylistic form chosen here suggests a certain level of careful distance between the two parties involved.)

This is the first text in a series of ten loosely connected pieces.

The second part can be found here: Nagoya