The Unintentional Hipster

One of the most frightening things just happened to me. I realized that I might have been bitten by the hipster bug. YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. I always thought that the scarf wearing, Starbucks sipping, horned rimmed wearing, obscure things lovers where fair game for ridicule. That was until a regular Joe looked at me with disappointed eyes, as I sat in a gas station parking lot, listening to Fonogenico (a Japanese band) with my horned rimmed glasses, an argyle sweater, and putting on some raspberry lotion on my chapped elbows.

What has happened to me? I have become a shell of the man I once was. This very scene would warrant a disappointed gaze from Jacques of life past. But I’m a victim of circumstance. HEAR ME OUT! This whole day was orchestrated by the Hipster gods to create a convert.

Earlier that morning I was getting dressed to go to sign some very important papers. I didn’t want to be to formal, but I also did not want to be to relaxed. I put on a light sweater that happened to be argyle (given to me by my mother in law) and a pair of jeans, that I realized 30 minutes later into my drive, I should give away to someone who weights a lot less than me.

I hopped in my wife’s car and her CD of Fonogenico was playing. We love their music because it was on some Anime we watched (xxxHOLiC…not as dirty as it looks). I let it play as I headed to the gas station. I didn’t play it because I had a smug sense of superiority and knowledge of the obscure, I just really liked their music. I didn’t realize it was playing loudly though.

Sitting there in the gas station parking lot I happened to realize my arms where chapped. After rummaging through my wife’s car the only thing I could find was some raspberry lotion. Jacques of life past would have just stayed chap because other men would smell “fruity weakness” and that would repel women. But being married makes you less phased by trivial things like scent.

As I sat at that gas station with those disappointed, judging, eyes from that regular Joe, I realize I’ve been to hard on the Hipsters. Maybe they are just a product of their circumstances.

By the way, for those of you wondering, the horned rimmed glasses are not a fashion statement. They happened to have been the only pair that could fit my prescription at the time. That’s my excuse and I stick by it!