This is True 1314

Randy Cassingham
Aug 24 · 5 min read

Have You Seen This Man? Police in Berlin, Conn., responded to a motorcycle crash, but as they arrived the biker jumped over a guardrail and fled into the woods. An extensive search came up empty, but three witnesses stepped forward to not only say they saw the man, but handed over their own sketches of the hit-and-run suspect. Police identified the trio as Myla, Joyce, and Julian — children aged 6, 7, and 8 — who drew their impressions of the man with crayons. “All three of them got the bloody face down,” said Officer Tom Bobok. “They had prepared the pictures on their own, without any prompting from us.” Police released the drawings online, noting “If anyone recognizes the man from these detailed drawings,” please call them. (RC/New Haven Register, Hartford Courant) …With that kind of evidence, the guy will surely decide to turn himself in.

The Kids’ Sketches: yeah, that guy is in for it.

Call Me Obliviot: A man walked into a Cleveland, Ohio, bank and handed a note to the teller demanding money. It was written on the back of a form from the Ohio Bureau of Motor Vehicles. “When the teller took the note, and looked at it and looked at the other side, she saw his name,” said FBI Special Agent Vicki Anderson. “She actually even referred to him as ‘Michael’,” Anderson continued, and “gave him the money and called him ‘Michael’ — and then notified law enforcement.” An arrest warrant was issued for Michael Harrell, 54, after confirming his identity on security footage. He was arrested a couple of days later. (MS/WJW Cleveland) …Well it was a good plan on paper.

No Parking: Halifax Regional Fire and Emergency in Nova Scotia, Canada, responded to a structure fire, but a car was parked right in front of the hydrant they needed for the water to fight it. The only way to hook up their very inflexible feed line was to smash it through the car’s windows — so they did. It is illegal to park within 5m of a fire hydrant, even if it’s not marked with a red curb. The stubborn fire took four hours to extinguish; police left the car with a parking ticket, and the fire department posted a photo of their solution online. (RC/CBC) …As a warning. Which won’t work.

TV’s on Them: Robyn Schorr noticed something on her porch in Glen Allen, Va., as she left for work. “I told my husband to get the package.” But then he sent her a picture of something that looked “like a TV from Back to the Future.” It turned out to be one of more than 20 old-fashioned television sets that had been left on porches in town; dozens of TVs had also turned up on the community’s porches less than a year ago. Police collected the sets and are investigating, but it’s not entirely clear that giving out TVs is a crime. In any event, the culprits may be hard to identify: they were caught on home-security cameras, but they were wearing TV sets on their heads as masks. (AC/WTVR Richmond) …So see whether anyone can pick them out of a television lineup.

Get More Stories: Woman wakes up to intruder lying on top of her, but she still gets the upper hand and the guy’s in jail. Man cited for having his P.O. Box on his driver’s license …even though the state issued it that way. Fugitive who taunted law enforcement online is quickly captured. Burglary almost certainly won’t be solved because victim had invited numerous anonymous people into his house. Obliviot can’t make french fries without setting his apartment on fire. Town tries to design public toilet that’s sex-proof — and go to amazing lengths (and cost). Florida woman’s toilet explodes; the why is the amazing part. You can still read all of these stories: just ask for your upgrade to start with the 18 August issue. Premium starts at just $9: See your options here and stop missing most of the stories.

Just Ain’t Right: The NYPD Bomb Squad rolled when a 911 caller reported two suspicious devices — stainless steel containers with lids — in the Fulton Street subway station, situated about half-way between the Brooklyn Bridge and New York’s World Trade Center site. The station was evacuated, and the bomb squad declared the devices safe: they were rice cookers, placed to induce panic. Security cameras quickly led police to a suspect: a panhandler who has been living on New York City’s streets. Larry Griffin II, of Bruno, W.Va., is already facing charges at home after he allegedly tried to seduce a minor by sending the child a video of himself having sex with a chicken. “There is some type of deviant behavior there, obviously,” said an unnamed West Virginia police spokesman. “In technical terms, there’s something that ain’t right with him.” (RC/New York Post) …Officer, could you put that in terms we lay people can understand?


Unnatural
Man’s Death Ruled to Be from Natural Causes
until Funeral Home Finds Stab Wounds

WSB Atlanta (Ga.) headline


Oisín in Ireland upgraded to Premium this week, and sent this note: “I’ve been on a free subscription for a couple of years now — and kept ‘meaning to’ sign up for a premium: thanks for all the free stories, and really looking forward to the extras. I had actually first heard of your site years back, while living in the U.S. (I may have been mooching off a free mail-out then too, but lost track through changes of email addresses), and for some reason thought of your site about two years ago (probably, reading about something absurd and thinking: hey, what about that site that had this kind of story…?) It’s a real bucket of fresh air when things seem just frustratingly absurd in general, to be able to laugh at some things in particular. Thanks again — and the very best to you.”

Thanks for your support, Oisín, and I really like the concept of True being “a real bucket of fresh air”! :-D

This Week’s Uncommon Sense Podcast: Can anything be done to stem the decline in bookstores from Amazon’s relentless domination? Yes: Uncommon Sense is already reversing the trend, and in a surprising way. As always you can find it in your favorite podcast app, or stream from the Show Page, where there is also a transcript: 040: Undaunted.

Basic Subscriptions to This is True are Free at https://thisistrue.com. All stories are completely rewritten using facts from the noted sources. This is True® is a registered trademark. Published weekly by ThisisTrue.Inc, PO Box 666, Ridgway CO 81432 USA (ISSN 1521–1932).

Copyright ©2019 by Randy Cassingham, All Rights Reserved.

This is True

Thought-Provoking Entertainment: newsletters from the oldest entertainment feature on the Internet.

Randy Cassingham

Written by

Online Publisher Since 1994 (https://thisistrue.com), Creator of https://HonoraryUnsubscribe.com & the Get Out of Hell Free card (https://GOOHF.com)

This is True

Thought-Provoking Entertainment: newsletters from the oldest entertainment feature on the Internet.

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