IF IT IS HEAVY, DROP IT

Secrets are like a sack of grain, the bigger the sack, the heavier the load and the harder it is to carry. Smaller sacks are easy, you can store them away in a dark corner of ones memory, they become insignificant. Its the bigger ones that we can not shake, they are the ones that weigh us down. You are so aware of them that the shame of having to carry this huge sack of grain, make you weak. You fear the shame might show on your face, furrowing over time. Your shame is apparent in your walk, you begin to lumber at every step. In the way you talk there is an audible heaviness in with every word.

Shame becomes apart of the way you function because you have not found a mental repository to deal with your heavy sack of grain. It eats away at your soul, you start formulating lies even for simple questions like “How are you?” giving answers like “fine” in order to avoid actually sharing your sack of grain in the fear of it might be to heavy for someone else to bear. You are not fine, in fact you are stranded on in a dystopia created by your own anxiety only because you are hiding a secret that was created out of shame.

Maybe if we can spill a bit of grain wherever we go we can relieve our shoulders of the stress of carrying heavy sacks of grain. We can mentally free ourselves of finding ways to cover up lies formulating at the tips of our tongues to create barriers for it to not spill. Maybe if we took the time to be honest with our feelings, we don’t have to suffer from the heaviness of carrying a heavy sack of grain on our back. Maybe if we seek the support we need we don’t have to crawl on our knees, bent over because of a sack of grain.