Another year, gone

A year of ups and downs, highs and lows; a year that propelled change in my life; a year that made me reach a mental saturation point and jarred me from the monotonic comfort zone I had built around myself.

My inner wars found new battlefields, as did my sanctuaries get new faces and places. I did things I never thought I could do; yet some things I had so far taken for granted, I was unable to do. Many relationships changed their dynamics; some ties were broken, new ties were forged, and some others still found new expression — deeper intimacy as well as red strings stretched thin. I am grateful for them all.

My demons from the previous year have not yet fully left. Every gain last year was coupled with loss in some form, that constantly kept my humility in check and my awareness alert. But the biggest lesson I learned — remembered — is acceptance. Acceptance for my inner demons. Acceptance for the need to fight them. Acceptance through my year-long quest for lost and found love, that the only love I was really seeking was self-love. Acceptance for change and growth. Acceptance for life, and choosing to make an effort to be happy despite it all.

At this moment, I’m choosing to accept 2018 for what it is; no false hopes or expectations, but simply make an effort to make the most of it. I’m also making a resolution to consciously take time out for myself without feeling guilty about it, and use it to travel, read, write, dance, act… whatever comes my way. To do science needs a break from science sometimes, for the world brings new perspectives to science just as science brings new perspectives to the world. What use are wings if one has forgotten how to fly?

I do not know how to do the cheering charm, or brew a batch of Felix Felicis (yet), but I do know this — ‘happiness can be found in the darkest of places, if only one remembers to turn on the light’. I truly hope this year gives wings to your dreams, strength in your battles, and overall, brings happiness, love and good health to you and to all.

Happy New Year 2018! :’)

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