3 strikes and yer out

“Father Brown Bear, you stand accused of pulling the delicate tendrils of Ms. Goldilocks hair from their roots, causing much pain to her and her hairdresser.”

“Yes, you honor.”

“We understand that you were upset that she had gobbled down your low calorie, high fiber porridge. The same porridge that you were dreaming about for six months in hibernation.Over garnished with berries as evident from your #2 priority in life.”

“Yes. That’s right.”

“No matter how delicious said porridge was or what wonders you consider it to bestow on your portly figure, it did not warrant hair pulling. Especially such glorious hair that smells like a summer meadow. Mmmm.”

“I understand your honor. Would you like to borrow my handkerchief to wipe your drool?”

“Huh? No, but thanks. Unfortunately, even your baby shares your attitude — when asked if your behavior was justified, he replied that it was ‘just right’”.

“How about Mama Bear, your honor?”

“We could not question Mama bear as she had gone furniture shopping for new chairs and fresh linen. We presume that the current furniture arrangement had left the house unbearable.”

“Yes. Ms. Locks has no control over her desires nor her bladder.”

“Apparently, Ms. Locks can’t see the forest for the trees and is now lost in the woods.”

“Serves her right, you honor.”

“Ah, that reminds me about your sentencing. As punishment — I hereby banish you to the North Pole.”

And that children, is the origin of the Polar Bear.

The End

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