4 Ways to Take Charge of Your Happiness

Tamara Hartley
Thrive Global
Published in
3 min readApr 26, 2018

So often we look outside ourselves for our happiness. We look to our spouse or significant other, to our children, or our jobs. We convince ourselves that we will be happy when…when we get that new job, when we get that raise and make more money, when we find that perfect husband or wife, or when we hit the lottery. There are so many variables we allow to shape or determine our happiness. We eventually convince ourselves that happiness will come…someday.

“Well there are seven days in the week, but Someday is not one of them.”

The truth is, happiness is a choice and you can decide, right now, to be happy despite your current circumstances. So, I want to share some ways to put this into practice.

4 ways you can take charge of your own happiness:

#1 Laugh and Find Humor

Laughter is the best medicine. I know it may be difficult to find humor in the midst of a trying situation or while you think you are experiencing some type of lack in life. But finding ways to laugh and lift your spirits during trying times helps you feel better, about yourself and possibly about the circumstance.

Like exercise, laughter releases endorphins and helps relieve stress. Watch your favorite movie or comedian. Play a game with your children, call or go out with a friend.

Laughter leads to joy. Learn to laugh and find joy in every situation.

#2 Express Gratitude

Be grateful. Learn to be thankful for all of your experiences. Express gratitude even when you don’t fully see the light at the end of the tunnel or fully understand and know your next move.

Expressing gratitude keeps you in a positive state of mind and brings you a sense of peace in knowing that all forces are working together for your higher good. When you show gratitude, you begin to see and focus more on what’s right in your life, versus what appears to be wrong in your life.

#3 Surround Yourself with Positive Energy

That’s right, get rid of toxic people. Have you ever been around someone who just drains your spirit with their negativity? Every time you see them they’re upset, complaining, and their face looks like they’re sucking on lemons.

If you are attracting negative people into your life, you need to change your circle and change your energy. Like attracts like. Stop being negative and surround yourself with positive energy. You will feel better about yourself and more optimistic about your life.

#4 Love Yourself

Love yourself, and find ways to make yourself happy every day. Forgive yourself for your past mistakes and failures. Accept yourself for who you are and know that you are enough. Whether you ever win the Mega Millions, get that corner office, or find Mr. or Mrs. Right, you are already enough.

“Never forget, loving yourself comes before loving anyone else.”

So, remember, no other person (including your spouse and children), and no other place or thing can “make” you happy. Happiness is a conscious choice and a way of life. It’s an inside job. Yes, I said it! Happiness is a choice, and you, and only you, are responsible for your own happiness.

Don’t wait on outside circumstances to “make” you happy. Go out and make yourself happy and do the things you love to do. And then bring your best self into your relationships, your job, and your life.

Originally published at www.tamarahartley.com on April 26, 2018.

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Tamara Hartley
Thrive Global

Wife, mother of five, speaker, author, coach and entrepreneur. Giving advice, tips and strategies for your Life, Relationships and Career. www.TamaraHartley.com