A Quick Fix to Whining, Complaining and Overall Bad Moods

(Perfect for Families, Friends and the Workplace)

Dr. Judy Yaron
Thrive Global
3 min readMar 15, 2017

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Kids whine. Kids complain. It’s a fact of Life.

They complain, because they didn’t get what they want. They whine because they don’t know what they want. They grumble because they’re bored. They groan because it’s Monday and they wanted it to be Tuesday. They moan because you’ve run out of their favorite cereal or they can’t find their library book. They gripe, because there’s more to Life than a trip to Disneyland, a day at the beach or the latest version of Candy Crush. They argue to no end, because they have chores and homework and it just plain sucks!

One thing’s for sure: nine times out of ten our kids’ whining and complaining is more about the trifles of Life than the serious stuff.

It’s not just the voice that’s wearing you down. It’s the shrugging of the shoulders and the rolling of the eyes. You’ve tried being patient — calm cool and collected like the supermom down the street — and talking them through it, but your kids are no way like the super kids down the street.

And to make matters worse, complaining is as contagious as the Plague. All it takes is one irritable child to ruin a perfect afternoon.

You’ve tried walking away, hoping that the storm will blow over, but that never happens. Your kids have your genes and are as stubborn as they come. You’ve told them time and time again that entertaining them 24/7 is not part of your job description, but alas, their whining and complaining goes on and on.

And all you want is for it to stop.

So, what can you do?

The next time your kids start complaining, nip it in the bud with the Complaint Chant. It’s easy. It’s fun. And … it works like magic.

  • Stand in a circle and hold hands.
  • Each person, in turn, steps into the center of the circle, shuts their eyes and chants their complaint, while performing a melodramatic move. (The chant is a short simple melody made up of a single note, to which all the words are sung. For extra effect the last note of the last word can be higher or lower.)
  • When done, the chanter returns to their place and joins hands with the others.
  • The group then repeats the chant and imitates the move.
  • When everyone has had a go, one person becomes the conductor and takes their place in the center of the circle.
  • When the conductor points to a participant, they chant their complaint. The conductor regulates the speed of the chants — pointing fast or slow. The conductor can also instruct everyone to chant together or start and stop participants in the middle of their chant.

Within a few minutes, the complaints will be forgotten, replaced by laughter and an overall upbeat mood.

When all those involved are feeling better — that’s the time to have a conversation to get to the bottom of things and discuss the issues at hand.

It’s time to take control of our lives.

It’s Time 2 Lead.

It’s time to THRIVE!

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